Kaka Ji, humare Sharma Ji bade dilwale hain! Unke, golu - molu face par mat jaana, warna wahin utha kar khaa jaayenge. 'Dilwale' Sharma Ji, apne aas - paas ke choti - choti magar moti personalities ke diwale nikalte hi rehte hain. Kai bande to Sharma Ji, se darr kar Diwali se pehle hi phoot jaate hain wo bhi bina paleete sulgaaye. Rahi sahi kasar, Sharma Ji, Sunil Shetty jaisi body dikha kar aur munh mein Cigar jala kar poori kar dete hain. Khud to Sharma Ji, Diwali ke Bumper Dhamake phodte rehte hain....Aur, hum jaise honhaar, talented writer, 'Say No To Fire Crackers!' ka phatta uthaye khade reh jaate hain. Aaj - kal poori Internet par Sharma Ji ki dhoom machi huyi thi...( Tu Nu Nu Nu Nu Nu...Yahan, par Samajik Sahyog lagayein Sharma Ji?) Saariyan Cookies, Browser, Hits, Favourites, jod - jod kar Sharma Ji ne apna Fan Base bada tagda bana liya tha....(Mama Ji, idhar Bhanje ko bhi thoda sa taste karne do! Bade hi K.K. ho aap)....Aur, ye sab banane ke liye Sharma Ji ne apna chehra chupa - chupa kar, Manoj "Bharat" Kumar ki Monotony par bhi kabja kar liya tha...(Lo, Tiranga ko bhi reference de di!)...Par, Sharma Ji ke asli chashme aaj utarne waale the!
Subah ke 6 baje hi apne, Khana Khazana waali Recipes, Bathroom mein laga kar Sharma Ji apni 'Sharma Ji Labs' ke aage chahalkadami kar rahe the!
Sharma Ji - Wahin ruk jaayo! Aage aaye to tum par Ankur ko chod dunga....Mera matlab apni Donali se thok dunga.
Sharma Ji ki taraf aate wo do saaye bedhadak chale aa rahe the.
Sharma Ji - Ek meter bhi aage badhe to 0.410 ki ye goliyaan bikher dunga...Main apni websites ka, Abhinay Deo...Ahm!...Abhinav Bindra hun!
Ab to saayon ki parchai bhi Sharma Ji ke pairon ko chune lagi thi.
Sharma Ji - Dekho, main 3 - 4 warning dene ke baad fire karta hun...Main, keh raha hun mere andar ke kutt...sapole ko mat jagayo!
Saayon aur Sharma Ji ka faasla ab kuch meters ka reh gaya tha.
Sharma Ji - Main keh raha hun main, Delhi ke Commonwealth Games mein as a spectator present the...Aur, meri kulche - cholon ki dakaar se log kaafi pravabhit huye the. Yahan tak ki ek upsthit Judge ne mujhe chappal dekar maari thi.
Wohi saaye ab, Sharma Ji ke radius mein pahunch gaye the.
Sharma Ji - Meown....Naani - Mummy!
Sharma Ji ne donali neeche phenki aur lage apna raag alapne.
Sharma Ji - Meri izzat par haath mat daalo...Dekho, ab to mere andar ka sher bhi bheeg kar, 'Meown - Meown' kar raha hai...Picchle sentence mein bhi ek extra kar di thi...Abla, Antifeminists par haath nahi uthate...Tumhari Naani - Mummy ki kasam ab ke baad, Karanwa ko bade - bade, acche paragraph waale review dunga, aur Rahuliya ko Fair Cream laga - laga kar, Lovely bana dunga.
Do, awazein ek - saath gunjin.
Bally - O, Papa ke Baba Jee!
Sagoo - Yea! Get up man..Fuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - 'O Baba ke Papa Jee!' Mera kaun sa pyaara chichora mujhe ye sab bolta hai...Dekhun to, Karan to aksar Baba ki dhoti hi Nirma Powder se dhota rehta hai, Rahul jitna bhi dho le phir bhi nahi nazar aata, Vishal to ladkon ke paas aata hi nahi, Mandar ne to mere Forum ke Moderator banne ke baad hi munh pher liya tha...Sab jalte hain...Hunh! Maine aap dono ko pehchana nahi?
Bally - Sharma Ji, main Bally aur ye Sagoo.
Sagoo - Play the Game. Fuuuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Oho, Famous DJ, Pop/Indipop Remixer aur Fusion banane waale. Par, aap to ek the...Koi, nayi technology aayi hai kya?
Bally - Arey, Sharma Ji hum dono aapke Facebook Friends hain. Aapne khud hi to apni Lab dekhne bulaya tha.
Sharma Ji - Facebook par itni saari Fake ID's hain ki main khud par bhi kabhi - kabhi shak karne lagta hun.
Sagoo - Sharma Ji's praises smell like a mixture of trickery and mockery...Fuuuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Uhun...Smell to iss, Sukhpaal ke munh se bhi aa rahi hai. Kaun si neem aur peepal ke ped ki jaatayon ka jamalghote ke saath sevan kar ke aaye ho. Ye, 'Fuuuuuu' karta hai to meri Thuuuuu nikal jaati hai..Aisa lag raha hai ki kisi ne mere munh par ghode ki punch rakhdi ho. Rs 5 waala, Chota Colgate manga dein?
Bally - Sharma Ji, sirf aap ke aur RC ke paas hi Jing - Bing, Frrrrrr, Bhatar - Boom.......Blang - Blang, Haaaaaaa,karne ke copyright nahi hain. Ye, Fuuuuu saanpon ke alawa public ke liye bhi reserved hai.
Sharma Ji - Haan, aajkal waise bhi Forum par saanp aur bicchu kaafi zada ho gaye hain, joki China Made bhi nahi lagte.
Sharma Ji, Bally aur Sagoo ko apni Lab ke andar lekar gaye.
Bally - Yahan to koi bhi rasayan ki bottlein, deemak dwara khaayi gayi kitaabein, 4 km se hi dikh sakne waale plastic ke bane nakli kankaal, waigarah nahi hain!
Sharma Ji - Shaktimaan ka Serial phir se nahi bana raha hun. Uske, rights abhi bhi Khanna Ji ke paas hi hain.
Sagoo - But, Sharma Ji this is like a factory outlet. It is not even a lab. Fuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - To kya tum dono ne yahan Punjabi Duet/Remix karna hai. Kakayon, kya Punjabi Pop Singeron ki koi kami reh gayi hai. Wohi, beat baari - baari reuse aur synthesize kare jaayo, aur uss mein ek - do naye Punjabi Adjective (Manmoniye, Soniye, Billo Raniye, Diljaaniye) add kar do...Male Rights bhi kuch hote hain...Kabhi, Billa Raja bhi banayo! Ab, likh diyo ki meri poori bhasha evam pranali mein yahin line sabse acchi laga. Ab, tak ka likha Urdu mein nahi hai. Meri har line Top Level ki hai.
Bally - Aapki, Billa Raja tak ki, Meown - Meown to samajh aa gayi. Par, ye last do lines kisko sambhodit kar rahin thin.
Sharma Ji - Ye, Intelligent Comedy ke punches the. Seekhna to tum logon ne kabhi hai nahi kuch...Isiliye, Facebook ke Friends tak hi seemit reh jaate ho.
Sagoo - Sharma Ji, we are only here to view your lab; not to learn anything. Fuuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Haan to main bhi Mardana hun...Bhavnayon mein kabhi - kabhi beh jaata hun. Ab, chalo ye dekho.....Ye, hain mere Tutpunjiye Robots!
Sharma Ji ne Bally Aur Sagoo ko table par pade aadhe bane huye Robots ke baare mein samjhana shuru kiya.
Sharma Ji - Ye, Tutpunjiye Bots hain! Googlebots aur Yahoobots ke mukaable inki shamta abhi kaafi dheemi hai. Par, Technology ke saath - saath chadaw aa jaayega. Ab, apna haath iss, Bot ke haath ke upar rakho. Darro nahi...Shabash!
Sagoo - Don't be shy my honey...Fuuuuuuu.
Bally ne jaise hi uss Tutpunjiye Bot ke upar apna haath rakha. Uska, haath jakda gaya.
Bally - Sharma Ji....Bachayo....Bacha Lo.
Sharma Ji - Maine, bache lene nahi hain. Maine, to ye Tutpunjiye bache ghar - ghar mein baantne hain. Phir, dekhiyo 'Mohitness' ka hi har taraf bol - bala hoga. Mere, Followers infinity cross kar jaayenge. Mark Suckerberg ki jagah mere upar movie banegi...The Mo - HIT Ness Factor..
Sagoo - Mark Zuckerberg, Sharma Ji. Fuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Ugalte hi rahiyo. Kabhi, information to tum logon ne absorb karni hi nahi. Ab suno....Ye, Tutpunjiye Bots ghar - ghar jaa kar bachon par kabza kar lenge. Inception, ki to main Parmanu Challon se dhajjiyan uda dunga....(Aajkal to, Parmanu ki jo Mid 2000's mein dhajjiyan udi thin wohi baramad nahi ho rahin!).
Sharma Ji, ne Bally aur Sagoo ko 'User Metamorphisisco. Co' {Copyrighted by Sharma Ji} dikhana shuru kiya.
Sharma Ji - Aur, ye doosra project hai joki abhi Primary Stage par hai. Ye hai, 'User Metamorphisisco. Co' {Copyrighted by Sharma Ji}
Bally - Aapne, banaya hai to copyright bhi aapka hi hoga na.
Sharma Ji - Eh Duniya Matlab Di...Yaara, Kaun Kisse Da Velli?
Sharma Ji ko Punjabi Pop rang mein rangta dekh, Bally Aur Sagoo Bhangra aur Gidha ka Fusion bana kar apni dhun mein kho gaye. Sharma Ji, cheekhe - chillaye. Par, Bally - Sagoo ki Remix ke aage Sharma Ji ki kisne sunni thi? Haar kar, Sharma Ji ne Bally ke munh par thappad thok diya aur Sagoo neeche gir gaya.
Sagoo - Aahhh...Fuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Bally, thappad to tujhe pada tha phir Sagoo kyun neeche gir gaya?
Bally - Sharma Ji, jab bhi Bhangra ya Gidha shuru hota hai to hum dono Fuse ho jaate hain. Phir, jiska bhi Fuse udta hai Voltage dono mein barabar bant jaati hai.
Sharma Ji - Wah! Humare, Forum ka bhi yahin haal hai. Kabhi, wahan par bhi aana. Bas, Google mein ja kar 'Trendster' likh diyo phir mere nana prakar ke Blogs, Harshes, Poems, Links, Messages, Reviews, Fame Leechers, etc tumhe wahan le aayenge.
Bally aur Sagoo ke haath jodne aur Sharma Ji ki gobar lagi chappal sunghne ke baad, Sharma Ji ne apne project ke baare mein batana shuru kiya.
Sharma Ji - Jaise ki tum dekh rahe ho inn kamaron mein maine alag - alag parkar ke, Users ikkthe kar rakhe hain. Inn, par hardam research hoti rehti hai. Ye hai, Bandar Junglee. Iski, diet poore saal mein sirf ek chaval ke daane ki hai. Iss, mein khud ko Superior samajhne ki galatfehmi iske DNA combinations ke kaaran paida huyi padi hai. Agar, isse khula chod dein to ye poore Nations mein Rabies, AIDES, Bird Flu, Dengu, Typhoid, Cholera, Malaria, aur haal hi mein develop huya Swine Flu phaila kar poore World ki haalat critical kar de. Isiliye, iska Danger Level bahut high hai. Khidki se door rahiyo, ye kabhi bhi kaat sakta hai.
Sagoo - Is he the only remaining species of his kind? Fuuuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Nahi, iska ek jodidaar bhi humne pakda tha. Par, tab hum inhe poori Lab mein befikar ghumne dete the. Aur, aise hi ek din iska jodidaar su - su karne ke bahane bhaag gaya. Tab se ye Veeru ki koi Jai nahi hai.
Bally - Sharma Ji, ye jo khidki mein se aapki taraf ghur raha hai. Ye, kaun hai?
Sharma Ji - Ye, Bonkur hai! Nayi, prajati hai. Iske, baare mein humare paas koi zada information nahi hai. Bas, iska mere saath kuch zada hi lagaav hai. Aur, ye jo chup - chaap kone mein baitha hai ye vilupti ke kaagar par pahunch chuka, Bonkura ka distant cousin, 'Su - Su Maar' hai. Isne, chashme pehen kar ek photo kheenchvayi thi jise hum bachchon ke manoranjan ke liye istemaal karte hain.
Sagoo - Look, a hippopotamus. Fuuuuu.
Sharma Ji - Ye, Hippopotamus aur Ghadiyal ka mixture hai. Iska naam, Kaaliyan Ghadiyan hain. Isse, humesha dark kamre mein rakha jaata hai.
Sharma Ji ne Bally aur Sagoo ke sab Metamorphisised Users, se milwaya, Handshake karwaya aur unki photo bhi le.
Sharma Ji - Ye lo. Ye humari sab se khaas entry hai.
Bally - Par, Sharma Ji, ye to ek dibbe mein pada ek kenchua hai.
Sharma Ji - Ek, chutkala sunata hun. RC Forum mein ab tak ki sab se faltu controversy kya huyi?
Sagoo - No Clue. Fuuuuu
Sharma Ji - Karan!
Sharma Ji ke thahake chut gaye.
Bally - Kuch, samajh mein nahi aaya Sharma Ji!
Sharma Ji - Intelligent Punches tum logon ke pare ki cheez hai....Lo, ab to deewar bhi aa gayi. Ab, Lab ki iss wall par tum logon ki tasveerin chada dun?
Sagoo ne apna munh, Sharma Ji ki taraf se ghumaya aur deewar ki taraf 180 Degree face karte huye, paani ki dhaar azad kar di.
Sharma Ji - Ae....Ye, kya kar rahe ho?
Sagoo - Suuuuu....Fuuuuuu!
Sharma Ji - Bally, usse rok. Mahangayi ke iss zamane mein iss rang ko kaise dho paayungi...Ahm!..paayunga.
Sharma Ji, roye - chillaye jaa rahe the. Par, Sagoo unki ek na sun raha tha.
Bally - Sab, aapki galati hai Sharma Ji! Aapne usse kaha tha ki wo Fuuuuu band kar de. To, usne kar di.
Sharma Ji - Lekin, patthe ne Su - Su kyun shuru kar di?
Bally - Ab, Sharma Ji usne aapki wall par kuch to Original likhna hi tha na. Aise, cut - paste kar ke thode wo 'Wah - Wahi!' lut sakta hai. Ye, hai uski originality ka namoona. Aur, iske liye, aapko bhonpu nahi khareedna padega. Har, subah aapko ye pakka rang iss duniya mein bhare Original aur Creative bandon ki yaad karwata rahega.
Sagoo - Play The Game!
