...is "Celebrating (un)Common Creativity!" Fan fiction, artworks, extreme genres & smashing the formal "Fourth wall"...Join the revolution!!! - Mohit Trendster

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Ishq mey Chloroform

Ishq mey Chloroform
-         Mohit Sharma (Trendster / Trendy Baba)

Ronit apne mohalle ki Rinnie naam ki ladki par flat tha. Dono jawan the, ek hi college mey padhte the, hesiyat mey bhi zyada antar nahi tha aur caste bhi ek thi. Matlab jaise kisi marathon runner ne 1-2 kilometers ki lead le li ho runner-up se. Cake Walk! Par Ronit ko baat taalne ki badi aadat thi. Rinnie use dekh kar muskurati thi, hint deti thi aur different prakaar ki mada aakarshan demonstration waali harkaten karti thi par saath engineering k baad  MBA k bhi 2 saal ho gaye to Rinnie ko laga ye banda Lolu-Chand hai. 
Ronit sahi mauke aur build up mey vishvaas rakhta tha. Rinnie k papa Mr. Pralay Pandit festivals mey us colony ki Samiti k swaghoshit sachiv the jabse wo aaye the colony mey. Ronit unko impress karne k liye kuch saalo se festivals par kaafi mehnat kar raha tha jis se Mogambo…..I mean Uncle ji khush bhi huey. Kai seasons mey lagataar aakhri moment par himmat jutane mey fail hone k baad Is baar usne decide kiya ki Diwali ka mauka achchha hai shaadi ki baat direct achchhe mood mey Uncle ji k saamne rakhne ka. Ronit ko 2 din pehle pata chala ki is baar Pandit family 2 shaadi attend karne  Gwalior jaa rahe hai. Ronit ne bina baat k Madhav Rao Sindhiya ji ko kosa kyoki wahi ek naam tha Gwalior se related uske zehan mey. 
Ab baari thi next big festival Holi ki, to Holi waale month mey Ronot k ghar Rinnie ki engagement ka invitation aaya, pata chala ki shaadi bhi April mey  hi hai. Ronit ne April mey paida huey apne ek dost ko ashleel gaaliyan suna kar apna krodh shaant kiya (kyoki April month se related wahi banda pehle dimaag mey aaya Ronit k). 
Orthodox aur andhvishvaadi Pandit ji ka parivaar, Rinnie ko ab kisi ki nazar na lag jaaye isliye bechari duniya se alag total lockdown ki jaa chuki thi. Ronit ne decide kiya ki wo aaj raat hi Rinnie ko manane ki kosish karega chupke se. Ronit rassi, slice ki bottle (pata nahi kyu laya gadha), torch, mask, chloroform (emergency k liye….aur rumaal bhul gaya sunghayega kaise/kisko ye ek sawal tha) lekar bagal k pipe se chadhne laga par lagta hai uspar shani ki dasha chal rahi thi Pipe se girkar wo bagal waale lawn ki ghaas kaatne waali machine par gira.
“AAAAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE…..Mummy!!!”
Usne kisi tarah dard control kiya, kuch serious to nahi hua tha par uska pairon mey mocha a gayi thi, haath-pair chhil bhi gaye the aur Slice ki bottle bhi fat gayit thi. Wo kuch samay tak dard k mare nirjeev pada raha, aesa lag raha tha jaise woe k laash hai bas antar ye tha uske charo taraf khoon ki jagah mango juice faila hua tha. 
Tabhi usko ek aawaz ne instant-sanjivni ki tarah attention mode mey khada kar diya kuch nanoseconds mey.
“Kaun hai wahan? Mai shor machaungi....wait...Utho!”
“Ronit! are you OK? Chot to nahi lagi? Ye sab karne ki kya zaroorat thi. College mey hi bol dete…I like you too. Ye chloroform kyu? Kidnap karoge kya?”
“Naina, wo baat nahi hai….”       
Tabhi Naina ki mummy ki aawaz aayi andar se jo is aur badh rahi thi.
“Ye kaisi aawaz thi kaun hai wahan? Naina Beta kya toota?”
Naina ki mummy ki aawaz se to jaise dono ki mummy si mar gayi.
Naina - “Ab kya Karen? Mummy maar daalengi mujhe…”
Ronit – “Mai cooler ki aad mey chhup jata hun andhere mey…”
Naina – “Tum Mummy ko nahi jaante, aayin hai to sab check karke jayegi poori tassalli se, dekho wo paanch rupaye waali one beam torch leke aa rahi hai.”
Ronit – “Mai chloroform to laya hun par hanky bhool gaya ghar pe, ab kya karun?”
Naina – “Hey Bhagwan…..” 
Tabhi Mummy close in flieder ki tarah agrasar hui aur Ronit cooler ki aad mey hua.
“Kaun tha wahan?”
Naina – “Koi dikha nahi, Maa…ped ki side dekho.”
“Pehle ghar ki side dekhungi…”
Yaani ab Naina ki Mummy ki 'use and throw' torch aur Ronit k beech 10-12 seconds ka antar tha. Naina ki mummy palti aur Naina ne Suresh Raina ki si furti dikhate hue apna duppatta utaara aur mummy ki one beam torch k upar se Ronit ko timely paas kiya jisme chloroform duppatte par lagayi aur beam ko cover karte hue Bombastic fidayin hamla kiya jisme aunty off guard caught hui aur Out hui!
Naina ki baaton aur harkaton ne Ronit ko bataya ki usko Naina kitna chahti hai. Jaate-jaate 2-4 chummiyan exchange hui aur agli Diwali Ronit rishta lekar Naina k ghar pahuncha.
….Samaptam!!!!  
Moral of the Story – Dil jo hai wo beauty se kahin decade zyada durable hota hai on an average to logo k dil ko dekho. Jo tumhe pyaar kare usko apnao, uske peechhe bhaagne se faayda nahi jiski priorities ka tum hissa na ho. 
....aur Trendy Baba k darbaar mey chanda chadhane se manchaha rishta milta hai given aapke chande ka amount chindi-chor type na ho. 
 Pic Courtesy  - Mr. Harjeet Singh Chadha

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