राजा की मिसमिसाहट (हास्य कहानी)

Digital Artwork - Andrei Militaru‎

बहुत पुरानी बात है...ऐसा लेखक को लगता है पर आप अपने हिसाब से टाइमलाइन सेट कर लो, कोई फॉर्मेलिटी वाली बात नहीं है। मैटरनल काका नाम का एक राजा था, जिसके द्वारा स्थापित पीपणीगढ़ नामक एक विशाल राज्य था, मतलब भोम्पूगढ़ जितना विशाल नहीं पर फिर भी विशाल मेगा मार्ट से बड़ा तो कहूंगा मैं! तो राजा मैटरनल काका को अपनी सेना और आम जनता को परेशान कर के बड़ा सुख मिलता था। आखिर अपने से कमज़ोर को सताने में किसे मज़ा नहीं आता? पता नहीं किसी वैद्य ने उन्हें मानसिक थेरेपी बताई थी या यह चीज़ मैटरनल ने स्वयं सोची थी। 

एक दिन मैटरनल काका रोज़ की खुराफात करने निकले थे और उन्हें टीले के पीछे एक सिर पर बड़े सलीके से काढ़े गए बाल दिखे। अचानक उनके मन में मिसमिसी छूटने लगी और उनकी उँगलियों में थिरकन मचने लगी। वो तेज़ी से उन बालो के स्वामी के पास पीछे से आये और ऐसे कोण से लात जमाई की वह व्यक्ति कलामंडी खाता हुआ नीचे जाकर गिरा। उसका शरीर मिट्टी में लोटमपोट हो गया पर उसके बाल अभी तक व्यवस्थित थे। यह बात पूर्णतावादी मैटरनल को कहाँ रास आने वाली थी? राजा ने उस भ्रमित व्यक्ति का खोपड़ा पकड़ के मिट्टी में लोटा दिया। कुछ इस तरह कि बेचारे व्यक्ति का एक-एक बाल भूरा हो जाए। 

अपनी विजय का आनंद उठाते मैटरनल काका को तब झटका लगा जब वह व्यक्ति एक सिद्ध मुनि निकला। धूलधुसरित मुनि पहले थोड़ी देर बच्चो की तरह रोये, फिर शांत होने के बाद जब वो राजा को श्राप देने को हुए तो मैटरनल अपने सैनिको के साथ वहाँ से भाग गया। उसे लगता था कि श्राप सिर्फ आमने-सामने दिया जा सकता है, ऐसा ही उसने कथाओं में सुना था। मुनि के नाक, कान, मुँह में मिट्टी भर गयी थी इसलिए वो आराम से श्राप सोच नहीं पाए और गुस्से में उन्होंने राजा के राज्य के कई गाँवो  को अजीब सा श्राप दे डाला। उस दिन के बाद से किसी गाँव में सिर्फ लड़के जन्म लेने लगे और किसी गाँव में सिर्फ लड़कियां। शुरुआत के कुछ महीने तो सब सामान्य रहा पर धीरे-धीरे लोगो को आभास हुआ कि किसी अपशगुन या श्राप के कारण राज्य के गाँवों में यह अजीब असंतुलन बढ़ रहा है। राजा के साथ रहने वाले मंत्री ने सभी घटनाओ का अवलोकन किया और पाया की मैटरनल द्वारा किसी सिद्ध व्यक्ति को परेशान करने के कारण ऐसा हो रहा है। राजा को सलाह दी गयी कि अबतक जिन सिद्ध लोगो, मुनियों को उसने परेशान किया है सबसे क्षमा मांग ले। वहीं मैटरनल काका अपनी गलती मानने को तैयार नहीं था, उसने सभी गर्भवती महिलाओं, जवान युवक-युवतियों को उनके गाँव के अनुसार इस तरह चिन्हित कर बसाया कि आगे पैदा होने वाले शिशुओं में गाँव के हिसाब से निर्धारित हो रहे लिंग की बाधा ना रहे। राजा ने ऐसी अकलमंदी जीवन में पहली बार दिखाई थी और परिणाम जानने के लिए वह उत्सुक था...कुछ महीनो बाद हद हो गयी! अब राज्य में पैदा होने वाले सभी बच्चे अलैंगिक या किन्नर के रूप में पैदा होने लगे, इसलिए कहते हैं ज़्यादा ओवरस्मार्टनेस कई बार गोबरस्मार्टनेस में बदल जाती है। 

राजा हार कर सभी मुनियों के पास गया और अपनी भूली-बिसरी भूलों की क्षमा-याचना की, तब एक गंजे ऋषि ने उसे बताया कि किस तरह मैटरनल काका ने उसे पूजा करते हुए टीले से गिराया और उसे धूल-मिट्टी में लोटा दिया। राजा के मौका-ए-वारदात से भागने के बाद उसने झुंझलाहट में मैटरनल के राज्य को ऐसा श्राप दिया। उस दिन के बाद से मुनि प्रतिशोध में जलता रहा और उसने अपने सुन्दर, घने बाल राजा के पश्चयताप करने तक के लिए कटवा लिए (या शायद कुछ इतिहासकारो की माने तो उस घटना के बाद उन्हें काफी डेंड्रफ हो गई थी इसलिए बाल कटवा लिए)। अपनी बात वापस लेने और बाल दोबारा उगाने की उसकी एक ही शर्त थी...

...मुनि ने मैटरनल को पूरी शिद्दत से कीचड़, मिट्टी लोटा-लोटा के परमसुख की प्राप्ति की और अपना श्राप वापस लिया। राज्य के सभी नवजात सामान्य हुए और राजा को अपनी गलती का सबक मिला... मतलब अब वो किसी अनजान व्यक्ति का पूरा बैकग्राउंड देखकर उसे छेड़ता है। 

समाप्त!

- मोहित शर्मा ज़हन

एकल-युगल-पागल (कहानी) - मोहित शर्मा ज़हन

"जी सर! मैंने चक्कू घोंप दिया ससुरे की टांगों में अब आपका जीतना पक्का।"

टेनिस एकल प्रतिस्पर्धा में स्टीव जो एक जाना-पहचाना नाम था, जिसके नाम कुछ टाइटल थे। हालांकि, पिछले कुछ वर्षों के दौरान वह सफलता से दूर ही रहा। फिटनेस के हिसाब से उसमे 2-3 सीजन का खेल बचा था और इस बीच वह अधिक से अधिक टाइटल अर्जित करना चाहता था। सबसे पहले वह तुलनात्मक रूप से आसान और नीची रैंक के खिलाड़ियों से भरे टूर्नामेंट चुनता था ताकि उसके जीतने की सम्भावना बढ़े, किस्मत से वह एक नामी टूर्नामेंट के सेमीफाइनल में पहुंचा जहां उसका प्रतिद्वंदी दुनिया का नंबर एक खिलाड़ी था। इस खिलाड़ी से पार पाना स्टीव के बस की बात नहीं थी। स्टीव ने उस खिलाड़ी को घायल करवाने के लिए अपने एक जुनूनी देशवासी को ब्रेनवाश किया कि देश के नाम और सम्मान के लिए उसे वर्ल्ड नंबर वन को खिलाड़ी घायल करना है। पूरी रात पार्टी कर अगले दिन वॉकओवर मिलना सुनिश्चित मान स्टीव कोर्ट पर उतरा जहाँ फिट्टम-फिट दुनिया का नंबर एक खिलाड़ी उसका इंतज़ार कर रहा था। उसके पैरो तले ज़मीन और खोपड़े छज्जे आसमान खिसक गए। काश कल न्यूज़ में कन्फर्म कर लेता तो दारु तो ना पीता, अब तो 6-0, 6-0 पक्का! पता नहीं किस बेचारे के पैरों में चक्कू घोंप दिया गधे ने? 

बगल के कोर्ट में इस प्रतियोगिता का युगल (डबल्स) टेनिस खेल रही एक टीम को वॉकओवर मिला क्योंकि उनकी विरोधी टीम के एक खिलाड़ी पर पिछली रात टांगलेवा हमला हुआ था, यह खिलाड़ी विश्व डबल्स टेनिस में नंबर एक रैंक पर था। 

इस कहानी से शिक्षा मिलती है जुनूनी के साथ-साथ थोड़ी अक्ल वाले बंदे-बंदियों से ऐसे काम करवाने चाहिए।

समाप्त!

भूत स्वैग - लेखक मोहित शर्मा ज़हन #mohitness

Holi festival 2014 Pic

---------------------------------

टीनएजर भूतों के एक ग्रुप के लड़के एक दूसरे पर शेखी बघार रहे थे। 

भोलू भूत - "भाई एक बार मैं इंद्र देव की मूर्ति के बगल से निकल चुका हूँ।" 

भक भूत - "चल बे! इतने में ही बस ..मै तो शिवजी भोलेनाथ की प्रतिमा के सामने से गया हूँ।" 

पीछे से आवाज़ - "बस-बस! लिपरीडिंग की थी तब तेरी सबने! कांपते हुए शंकर जी के सामने नर्वसनेस में जय संतोषी माता निकल रहा था तेरे मुंह से। वो तो बाइचांस की बात है कि भोलेबाबा ने तुझे माफ़ कर दिया होगा।"

थोड़ा झेंपने और ध्यान बंटने के बाद फिर डिस्कशन चालू।

भोलू भूत - "यार तू भरी सुबह में क्यों निकलता है। कोई तांत्रिक पकड़ ले, कुछ उंच नीच हो जाए तो क्या इज़्ज़त रह जायेगी तेरी फैमिली की?"

भक भूत - "अबे भाई-यार भक बे! तुम डरपोक सुबह साढ़े तीन बजे निकल लेते हो, हम साढ़े 6 से पहले वापस नहीं जाते, अपनी शान में रहते है।" 

पीछे से आवाज़ -  "....और तभी रोशनी से झुलस कर फ्राइड मोमोज़ हुए फिरते हो।" 

भक भूत ने मण्डली के हंसने से पहले ही नया दावा किया - "मेरे सुबह घूमने की आदत की वजह से...बाय चांस मुझे देख कर एक बार एक अंकल जी को हार्ट अटैक आ गया और वो मर गए।"

पीछे से आवाज़ - "वो उन्हें पहले से ही अटैक पड़ा था, तू तो बस क्रेडिट लेने कूद पड़ा उनके सामने उनके मरने के बाद।" 

भक भूत - "अरे! ये कौन है पीछे से अफवाहें फैला रहा है? अब एक हीरो शान्ति से अपने किस्से भी नहीं सुना सकता !!"

पीछे की आवाज़ का मालिक आगे आया - "मै वही अंकल जी का भूत हूँ, जिसकी नेचुरल डेथ का क्रेडिट तू अपनी दहशत के नाम चढ़ा रहा था। आजा मेरी नन्ही परी...कुछ छड़ी खा ले....तेरे अंदर का स्वैग निकालू।"

समाप्त!

#mohitness #mohit_trendster #freelance_talents

Political Satire India (AAP)

"आप ने कहा है वैसी आम चीज़ें सोच कर लाओ, जो गोवा के मुख्यमंत्री मनोहर पर्रीकर ने अभी तक ना कि हों। हाँ अगर... राखी सावंत ने कर रखी हों तो चलेगा।"

Cartoon With Artist Mr. Srijit Sreejith (Thanda Pakouda) Letters - Mr. Youdhveer Singh

*Just for fun people...serious mat hona. :)

Jerry Bhaiya ka India Tour

Jerry Tour of India :)

Mohit Sharma (Trendy Baba) with super talented artist Atharv Thakur, Youdhveer Singh.

Chor ka Logic!!!

....Filmy Clicheness, Jo wakai mein chor NAHI hota wo bhi to ye hi bolega Uncle ki "Mai Chor NAHI hun..."

 "Maine Chori Nahi ki..."

 "Chup! Har chor ye hi bolta hai..."

"To jo chor nahi hai wo bhi to wo kya bolega?....Mai Tumhare bachche ki maa banne waali hun!!!"

- Mohit Sharma (Trendster / Trendy Baba) 

Meri Bhaang Wali Ice Cream !!!! (Poem, 18+)

Masti mey ye rhyming ki hai hip hop style with naughty punches. Aap sabhi ko ek baar phir se Happy Holi!!! Just for fun...

Meri Bhaang Wali Ice Cream !!!!

Aetbaar karegi to jaanegi….
Labo se lagayegi to baat maanegi…
Dil bolega tring-tring….jo legi tu..
Meri Bhaang waali Ice Cream !!!!

Pila deta hai ye saaki bade auhdo tak ko paani….
Ek to fitting ka salwar-suit tera…
Aur doosra qatil tera dupatta Dhaani…
Ban jaa janeman mere naatiyon ki Nani…
Nikalva degi teri multiple Screams…
Meri Bhaang waali Ice Cream !!!!

Festive season ki chhut mujhe bhunani…
Point Blank range se apni pichkari hai chalani…
Free ki nahi hai ye Ice Cream…teri haath ki ghujiya hai khaani….
Itne nakhre sehat kharab kar denge meri Rani....
Kar degi tera har signal Green...
Meri Bhaang waali Ice Cream !!!!

Uncle nahi hai ghar pe…
Nashe mey apna ghar samajh ke abhi unhe aadhe ghante peeche ke gharo ki kundi hai khatkhatani...
Anyway, phir bhi chhupa di hai maine unki bandook Dunali…
Ab ye teri zimmedari hai…..tumhe sirf Aunty hai sulaani…
Kab samjhogi bada ho gaya hai….teri colony ka Chhota Bheem….le na..
Meri Bhaang waali Ice Cream !!!!

Gum ho jaayegi teri double chin…
Mera Intezaar karegi taare gin-gin…
Phir chahe jab bhi milegi…gaal par haath phira kar bolegi…”How have you been?”
Jamegi apni tagdi tag team…
Bhaang ki kick better than vodka-desi-rum ya jin….
Ghoomayegi muft mey tujhe London se Chin…
Charsi ho gaya tere pehlu ke bin…
Mat kar mera dil tod ke sin…
Jaldi muh mey le…arre, ab to pakad…pighalne lagi hai…
Meri Bhaang Waali Ice Cream !!!!

- Mohit Sharma (Trendy Baba)

Ishq mey Chloroform

Ishq mey Chloroform

-         Mohit Sharma (Trendster / Trendy Baba)

Ronit apne mohalle ki Rinnie naam ki ladki par flat tha. Dono jawan the, ek hi college mey padhte the, hesiyat mey bhi zyada antar nahi tha aur caste bhi ek thi. Matlab jaise kisi marathon runner ne 1-2 kilometers ki lead le li ho runner-up se. Cake Walk! Par Ronit ko baat taalne ki badi aadat thi. Rinnie use dekh kar muskurati thi, hint deti thi aur different prakaar ki mada aakarshan demonstration waali harkaten karti thi par saath engineering k baad  MBA k bhi 2 saal ho gaye to Rinnie ko laga ye banda Lolu-Chand hai. 

Ronit sahi mauke aur build up mey vishvaas rakhta tha. Rinnie k papa Mr. Pralay Pandit festivals mey us colony ki Samiti k swaghoshit sachiv the jabse wo aaye the colony mey. Ronit unko impress karne k liye kuch saalo se festivals par kaafi mehnat kar raha tha jis se Mogambo…..I mean Uncle ji khush bhi huey. Kai seasons mey lagataar aakhri moment par himmat jutane mey fail hone k baad Is baar usne decide kiya ki Diwali ka mauka achchha hai shaadi ki baat direct achchhe mood mey Uncle ji k saamne rakhne ka. Ronit ko 2 din pehle pata chala ki is baar Pandit family 2 shaadi attend karne  Gwalior jaa rahe hai. Ronit ne bina baat k Madhav Rao Sindhiya ji ko kosa kyoki wahi ek naam tha Gwalior se related uske zehan mey. 

Ab baari thi next big festival Holi ki, to Holi waale month mey Ronot k ghar Rinnie ki engagement ka invitation aaya, pata chala ki shaadi bhi April mey  hi hai. Ronit ne April mey paida huey apne ek dost ko ashleel gaaliyan suna kar apna krodh shaant kiya (kyoki April month se related wahi banda pehle dimaag mey aaya Ronit k). 

Orthodox aur andhvishvaadi Pandit ji ka parivaar, Rinnie ko ab kisi ki nazar na lag jaaye isliye bechari duniya se alag total lockdown ki jaa chuki thi. Ronit ne decide kiya ki wo aaj raat hi Rinnie ko manane ki kosish karega chupke se. Ronit rassi, slice ki bottle (pata nahi kyu laya gadha), torch, mask, chloroform (emergency k liye….aur rumaal bhul gaya sunghayega kaise/kisko ye ek sawal tha) lekar bagal k pipe se chadhne laga par lagta hai uspar shani ki dasha chal rahi thi Pipe se girkar wo bagal waale lawn ki ghaas kaatne waali machine par gira.

“AAAAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEE…..Mummy!!!”

Usne kisi tarah dard control kiya, kuch serious to nahi hua tha par uska pairon mey mocha a gayi thi, haath-pair chhil bhi gaye the aur Slice ki bottle bhi fat gayit thi. Wo kuch samay tak dard k mare nirjeev pada raha, aesa lag raha tha jaise woe k laash hai bas antar ye tha uske charo taraf khoon ki jagah mango juice faila hua tha. 

Tabhi usko ek aawaz ne instant-sanjivni ki tarah attention mode mey khada kar diya kuch nanoseconds mey.

“Kaun hai wahan? Mai shor machaungi....wait...Utho!”

“Ronit! are you OK? Chot to nahi lagi? Ye sab karne ki kya zaroorat thi. College mey hi bol dete…I like you too. Ye chloroform kyu? Kidnap karoge kya?”

“Naina, wo baat nahi hai….”       

Tabhi Naina ki mummy ki aawaz aayi andar se jo is aur badh rahi thi.

“Ye kaisi aawaz thi kaun hai wahan? Naina Beta kya toota?”

Naina ki mummy ki aawaz se to jaise dono ki mummy si mar gayi.

Naina - “Ab kya Karen? Mummy maar daalengi mujhe…”

Ronit – “Mai cooler ki aad mey chhup jata hun andhere mey…”

Naina – “Tum Mummy ko nahi jaante, aayin hai to sab check karke jayegi poori tassalli se, dekho wo paanch rupaye waali one beam torch leke aa rahi hai.”

Ronit – “Mai chloroform to laya hun par hanky bhool gaya ghar pe, ab kya karun?”

Naina – “Hey Bhagwan…..” 

Tabhi Mummy close in flieder ki tarah agrasar hui aur Ronit cooler ki aad mey hua.

“Kaun tha wahan?”

Naina – “Koi dikha nahi, Maa…ped ki side dekho.”

“Pehle ghar ki side dekhungi…”

Yaani ab Naina ki Mummy ki 'use and throw' torch aur Ronit k beech 10-12 seconds ka antar tha. Naina ki mummy palti aur Naina ne Suresh Raina ki si furti dikhate hue apna duppatta utaara aur mummy ki one beam torch k upar se Ronit ko timely paas kiya jisme chloroform duppatte par lagayi aur beam ko cover karte hue Bombastic fidayin hamla kiya jisme aunty off guard caught hui aur Out hui!

Naina ki baaton aur harkaton ne Ronit ko bataya ki usko Naina kitna chahti hai. Jaate-jaate 2-4 chummiyan exchange hui aur agli Diwali Ronit rishta lekar Naina k ghar pahuncha.

….Samaptam!!!!  

Moral of the Story – Dil jo hai wo beauty se kahin decade zyada durable hota hai on an average to logo k dil ko dekho. Jo tumhe pyaar kare usko apnao, uske peechhe bhaagne se faayda nahi jiski priorities ka tum hissa na ho. 

....aur Trendy Baba k darbaar mey chanda chadhane se manchaha rishta milta hai given aapke chande ka amount chindi-chor type na ho. 

 Pic Courtesy  - Mr. Harjeet Singh Chadha

Janta Robots Zindabad!!

llll Janta Robots llll **Black Comedy-Satire** Ye ek satire hai India k adhiktar politicians par jo janta virodhi activities karne k baad bhi press conferences-public appearances mey janta k hiteshi bane rehte hai...doosro k dard, dukh par rajneeti karte hai, bina soche samjhe aag mey ghee daalne jaise bayaan de dete hai....rajneeti mey aane se apni maut tak rajneeti hi karte rehte hai...iska udeshya kisi ko thes pahunchana bilkul nahi hai. - Mohit Sharma (Trendster/Trendy Baba) with artist Dheeraj DK Boss

Heroes in Real Harsh World Series

The second and final edition of "Heroes in Real Harsh World" with lots of parodies, what if experiments on Indian Comics Characters (maily Raj Comics). Originally these scenes and stories were posted on Raj Comics Forums and Website between 2006 to 2009. USP of this Book are stories "Bacha Lo!" and "Doga Run". Also includes nice artworks by Bhagwant Bhalla ji. This is a whooping 110 Page volume unlike the first 42 Page edition. A treat for Indian Comics Fans. Available on following sites and their allied networks.

Scribd (recommended) –
http://www.scribd.com/doc/99304204/Heroes-in-Real-Harsh-World-Finale

My-Ebook – 
http://www.myebook.com/index.php?option=ebook&id=135861

ISSUU -
http://issuu.com/mohit-trendy-baba/docs/heroes-in-real-harsh-world

- Mohit Sharma (Trendster / Trendy Baba)

Being (Trendy) Baba!

....is very-VERY difficult and challenging. You have to do crazy stuff to maintain and increase your stardom.

1) - See if you are implementing a new idea (like me doing meditation, pooja in between this lehar Peps...I mean only 'Lehar'). You should be well aware of the side effects of trying something new. In this case I felt Gulguli, loss of sensation, urge to relive my childhood by SU-SU-ing in disguise but as a true Baba...I fought *we shall overcome* background (haan-haan theek hai, supporting staff ho to peechhe se madad karo na, script mey aane ka bahana chahiye....what bunch of unprofessional people!) & overcame these evil things. Cameraman, kaam pe dhyaan do. Maine ninni si aankhen khol rakhi hai aur tum gaon-waaliyon ko kyu cover kar rahe ho? Yahan tumhara kaam hai SIRF MERE PHOTO KHEENCHNA, Nothing else. Ullu!



-------------X--------------X---------------X---------------X------------

2) - Mujhe aesa kyu lag raha hai ki mai beh raha hun? Aye cameraman, bacha le mujhe! Mai zyada der tak bina darr waale expressions nahi rakh sakta. Aye Babu...aye Bhaiya bacha le. Wo to maine aese hi kaha tha ki tumhara kaam sirf mere photo kheenchna hai....aur Ullu to muh se nikal gaya protocol ki formality mey, waise ullu to ek sammaan hai. Lakshmi Maiya ki sawari hai....achchha mai ullu.....arre...arre...AAAAAAAAAAAA! Aakhri baar mere Blogs aur FB update kar diyo....password to sun le kuttey....nahi-nahi...achchha sorry! Kutta to Shri Kaal Bhairav ji ki sawari hota hai.


-------------X--------------X---------------X---------------X-----------

Kya?



Ye Kya hai?



1 Minute...ye pic kis lulu ne Black & White ki? Itni creativity kismey fhat padi? Ki banda mar gaya to uski pic B/W kar do. Matlab wait nahi kar sakte ninna sa bhi.



"Mohit Baba! Lulu kinki sawari hoti hai?"



Chup! Lulu-Vulu kuch nahi hota. Sab dimaag ka weham hai.



-------------X--------------X---------------X---------------X-----------

Aah! wo to bhala ho us gaon waali ka jisne...mera pait aur chest pump karke paani nikala aur mouth-to-mouth CPR..ahem!



....The End!

From Sharma Ji Labs....Hum Nahi Ugate Abs!

Kaka Ji, humare Sharma Ji bade dilwale hain! Unke, golu - molu face par mat jaana, warna wahin utha kar khaa jaayenge. 'Dilwale' Sharma Ji, apne aas - paas ke choti - choti magar moti personalities ke diwale nikalte hi rehte hain. Kai bande to Sharma Ji, se darr kar Diwali se pehle hi phoot jaate hain wo bhi bina paleete sulgaaye. Rahi sahi kasar, Sharma Ji, Sunil Shetty jaisi body dikha kar aur munh mein Cigar jala kar poori kar dete hain. Khud to Sharma Ji, Diwali ke Bumper Dhamake phodte rehte hain....Aur, hum jaise honhaar, talented writer, 'Say No To Fire Crackers!' ka phatta uthaye khade reh jaate hain. Aaj - kal poori Internet par Sharma Ji ki dhoom machi huyi thi...( Tu Nu Nu Nu Nu Nu...Yahan, par Samajik Sahyog lagayein Sharma Ji?) Saariyan Cookies, Browser, Hits, Favourites, jod - jod kar Sharma Ji ne apna Fan Base bada tagda bana liya tha....(Mama Ji, idhar Bhanje ko bhi thoda sa taste karne do! Bade hi K.K. ho aap)....Aur, ye sab banane ke liye Sharma Ji ne apna chehra chupa - chupa kar, Manoj "Bharat" Kumar ki Monotony par bhi kabja kar liya tha...(Lo, Tiranga ko bhi reference de di!)...Par, Sharma Ji ke asli chashme aaj utarne waale the!

Subah ke 6 baje hi apne, Khana Khazana waali Recipes, Bathroom mein laga kar Sharma Ji apni 'Sharma Ji Labs' ke aage chahalkadami kar rahe the!

Sharma Ji - Wahin ruk jaayo! Aage aaye to tum par Ankur ko chod dunga....Mera matlab apni Donali se thok dunga.

Sharma Ji ki taraf aate wo do saaye bedhadak chale aa rahe the.

Sharma Ji - Ek meter bhi aage badhe to 0.410 ki ye goliyaan bikher dunga...Main apni websites ka, Abhinay Deo...Ahm!...Abhinav Bindra hun!

Ab to saayon ki parchai bhi Sharma Ji ke pairon ko chune lagi thi.

Sharma Ji - Dekho, main 3 - 4 warning dene ke baad fire karta hun...Main, keh raha hun mere andar ke kutt...sapole ko mat jagayo!

Saayon aur Sharma Ji ka faasla ab kuch meters ka reh gaya tha.

Sharma Ji - Main keh raha hun main, Delhi ke Commonwealth Games mein as a spectator present the...Aur, meri kulche - cholon ki dakaar se log kaafi pravabhit huye the. Yahan tak ki ek upsthit Judge ne mujhe chappal dekar maari thi.

Wohi saaye ab, Sharma Ji ke radius mein pahunch gaye the.

Sharma Ji - Meown....Naani - Mummy!

Sharma Ji ne donali neeche phenki aur lage apna raag alapne.

Sharma Ji - Meri izzat par haath mat daalo...Dekho, ab to mere andar ka sher bhi bheeg kar, 'Meown - Meown' kar raha hai...Picchle sentence mein bhi ek extra kar di thi...Abla, Antifeminists par haath nahi uthate...Tumhari Naani - Mummy ki kasam ab ke baad, Karanwa ko bade - bade, acche paragraph waale review dunga, aur Rahuliya ko Fair Cream laga - laga kar, Lovely bana dunga.

Do, awazein ek - saath gunjin.

Bally - O, Papa ke Baba Jee!

Sagoo - Yea! Get up man..Fuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - 'O Baba ke Papa Jee!' Mera kaun sa pyaara chichora mujhe ye sab bolta hai...Dekhun to, Karan to aksar Baba ki dhoti hi Nirma Powder se dhota rehta hai, Rahul jitna bhi dho le phir bhi nahi nazar aata, Vishal to ladkon ke paas aata hi nahi, Mandar ne to mere Forum ke Moderator banne ke baad hi munh pher liya tha...Sab jalte hain...Hunh! Maine aap dono ko pehchana nahi?

Bally - Sharma Ji, main Bally aur ye Sagoo.

Sagoo - Play the Game. Fuuuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Oho, Famous DJ, Pop/Indipop Remixer aur Fusion banane waale. Par, aap to ek the...Koi, nayi technology aayi hai kya?

Bally - Arey, Sharma Ji hum dono aapke Facebook Friends hain. Aapne khud hi to apni Lab dekhne bulaya tha.

Sharma Ji - Facebook par itni saari Fake ID's hain ki main khud par bhi kabhi - kabhi shak karne lagta hun.

Sagoo - Sharma Ji's praises smell like a mixture of trickery and mockery...Fuuuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Uhun...Smell to iss, Sukhpaal ke munh se bhi aa rahi hai. Kaun si neem aur peepal ke ped ki jaatayon ka jamalghote ke saath sevan kar ke aaye ho. Ye, 'Fuuuuuu' karta hai to meri Thuuuuu nikal jaati hai..Aisa lag raha hai ki kisi ne mere munh par ghode ki punch rakhdi ho. Rs 5 waala, Chota Colgate manga dein?

Bally - Sharma Ji, sirf aap ke aur RC ke paas hi Jing - Bing, Frrrrrr, Bhatar - Boom.......Blang - Blang, Haaaaaaa,karne ke copyright nahi hain. Ye, Fuuuuu saanpon ke alawa public ke liye bhi reserved hai.

Sharma Ji - Haan, aajkal waise bhi Forum par saanp aur bicchu kaafi zada ho gaye hain, joki China Made bhi nahi lagte.

Sharma Ji, Bally aur Sagoo ko apni Lab ke andar lekar gaye.

Bally - Yahan to koi bhi rasayan ki bottlein, deemak dwara khaayi gayi kitaabein, 4 km se hi dikh sakne waale plastic ke bane nakli kankaal, waigarah nahi hain!

Sharma Ji - Shaktimaan ka Serial phir se nahi bana raha hun. Uske, rights abhi bhi Khanna Ji ke paas hi hain.

Sagoo - But, Sharma Ji this is like a factory outlet. It is not even a lab. Fuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - To kya tum dono ne yahan Punjabi Duet/Remix karna hai. Kakayon, kya Punjabi Pop Singeron ki koi kami reh gayi hai. Wohi, beat baari - baari reuse aur synthesize kare jaayo, aur uss mein ek - do naye Punjabi Adjective (Manmoniye, Soniye, Billo Raniye, Diljaaniye) add kar do...Male Rights bhi kuch hote hain...Kabhi, Billa Raja bhi banayo! Ab, likh diyo ki meri poori bhasha evam pranali mein yahin line sabse acchi laga. Ab, tak ka likha Urdu mein nahi hai. Meri har line Top Level ki hai.

Bally - Aapki, Billa Raja tak ki, Meown - Meown to samajh aa gayi. Par, ye last do lines kisko sambhodit kar rahin thin.

Sharma Ji - Ye, Intelligent Comedy ke punches the. Seekhna to tum logon ne kabhi hai nahi kuch...Isiliye, Facebook ke Friends tak hi seemit reh jaate ho.

Sagoo - Sharma Ji, we are only here to view your lab; not to learn anything. Fuuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Haan to main bhi Mardana hun...Bhavnayon mein kabhi - kabhi beh jaata hun. Ab, chalo ye dekho.....Ye, hain mere Tutpunjiye Robots!

Sharma Ji ne Bally Aur Sagoo ko table par pade aadhe bane huye Robots ke baare mein samjhana shuru kiya.

Sharma Ji - Ye, Tutpunjiye Bots hain! Googlebots aur Yahoobots ke mukaable inki shamta abhi kaafi dheemi hai. Par, Technology ke saath - saath chadaw aa jaayega. Ab, apna haath iss, Bot ke haath ke upar rakho. Darro nahi...Shabash!

Sagoo - Don't be shy my honey...Fuuuuuuu.

Bally ne jaise hi uss Tutpunjiye Bot ke upar apna haath rakha. Uska, haath jakda gaya.

Bally - Sharma Ji....Bachayo....Bacha Lo.

Sharma Ji - Maine, bache lene nahi hain. Maine, to ye Tutpunjiye bache ghar - ghar mein baantne hain. Phir, dekhiyo 'Mohitness' ka hi har taraf bol - bala hoga. Mere, Followers infinity cross kar jaayenge. Mark Suckerberg ki jagah mere upar movie banegi...The Mo - HIT Ness Factor..

Sagoo - Mark Zuckerberg, Sharma Ji. Fuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Ugalte hi rahiyo. Kabhi, information to tum logon ne absorb karni hi nahi. Ab suno....Ye, Tutpunjiye Bots ghar - ghar jaa kar bachon par kabza kar lenge. Inception, ki to main Parmanu Challon se dhajjiyan uda dunga....(Aajkal to, Parmanu ki jo Mid 2000's mein dhajjiyan udi thin wohi baramad nahi ho rahin!).

Sharma Ji, ne Bally aur Sagoo ko 'User Metamorphisisco. Co' {Copyrighted by Sharma Ji} dikhana shuru kiya.

Sharma Ji - Aur, ye doosra project hai joki abhi Primary Stage par hai. Ye hai, 'User Metamorphisisco. Co' {Copyrighted by Sharma Ji}

Bally - Aapne, banaya hai to copyright bhi aapka hi hoga na.

Sharma Ji - Eh Duniya Matlab Di...Yaara, Kaun Kisse Da Velli?

Sharma Ji ko Punjabi Pop rang mein rangta dekh, Bally Aur Sagoo Bhangra aur Gidha ka Fusion bana kar apni dhun mein kho gaye. Sharma Ji, cheekhe - chillaye. Par, Bally - Sagoo ki Remix ke aage Sharma Ji ki kisne sunni thi? Haar kar, Sharma Ji ne Bally ke munh par thappad thok diya aur Sagoo neeche gir gaya.

Sagoo - Aahhh...Fuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Bally, thappad to tujhe pada tha phir Sagoo kyun neeche gir gaya?

Bally - Sharma Ji, jab bhi Bhangra ya Gidha shuru hota hai to hum dono Fuse ho jaate hain. Phir, jiska bhi Fuse udta hai Voltage dono mein barabar bant jaati hai.

Sharma Ji - Wah! Humare, Forum ka bhi yahin haal hai. Kabhi, wahan par bhi aana. Bas, Google mein ja kar 'Trendster' likh diyo phir mere nana prakar ke Blogs, Harshes, Poems, Links, Messages, Reviews, Fame Leechers, etc tumhe wahan le aayenge.

Bally aur Sagoo ke haath jodne aur Sharma Ji ki gobar lagi chappal sunghne ke baad, Sharma Ji ne apne project ke baare mein batana shuru kiya.

Sharma Ji - Jaise ki tum dekh rahe ho inn kamaron mein maine alag - alag parkar ke, Users ikkthe kar rakhe hain. Inn, par hardam research hoti rehti hai. Ye hai, Bandar Junglee. Iski, diet poore saal mein sirf ek chaval ke daane ki hai. Iss, mein khud ko Superior samajhne ki galatfehmi iske DNA combinations ke kaaran paida huyi padi hai. Agar, isse khula chod dein to ye poore Nations mein Rabies, AIDES, Bird Flu, Dengu, Typhoid, Cholera, Malaria, aur haal hi mein develop huya Swine Flu phaila kar poore World ki haalat critical kar de. Isiliye, iska Danger Level bahut high hai. Khidki se door rahiyo, ye kabhi bhi kaat sakta hai.

Sagoo - Is he the only remaining species of his kind? Fuuuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Nahi, iska ek jodidaar bhi humne pakda tha. Par, tab hum inhe poori Lab mein befikar ghumne dete the. Aur, aise hi ek din iska jodidaar su - su karne ke bahane bhaag gaya. Tab se ye Veeru ki koi Jai nahi hai.

Bally - Sharma Ji, ye jo khidki mein se aapki taraf ghur raha hai. Ye, kaun hai?

Sharma Ji - Ye, Bonkur hai! Nayi, prajati hai. Iske, baare mein humare paas koi zada information nahi hai. Bas, iska mere saath kuch zada hi lagaav hai. Aur, ye jo chup - chaap kone mein baitha hai ye vilupti ke kaagar par pahunch chuka, Bonkura ka distant cousin, 'Su - Su Maar' hai. Isne, chashme pehen kar ek photo kheenchvayi thi jise hum bachchon ke manoranjan ke liye istemaal karte hain.

Sagoo - Look, a hippopotamus. Fuuuuu.

Sharma Ji - Ye, Hippopotamus aur Ghadiyal ka mixture hai. Iska naam, Kaaliyan Ghadiyan hain. Isse, humesha dark kamre mein rakha jaata hai.

Sharma Ji ne Bally aur Sagoo ke sab Metamorphisised Users, se milwaya, Handshake karwaya aur unki photo bhi le.

Sharma Ji - Ye lo. Ye humari sab se khaas entry hai.

Bally - Par, Sharma Ji, ye to ek dibbe mein pada ek kenchua hai.

Sharma Ji - Ek, chutkala sunata hun. RC Forum mein ab tak ki sab se faltu controversy kya huyi?

Sagoo - No Clue. Fuuuuu

Sharma Ji - Karan!

Sharma Ji ke thahake chut gaye.

Bally - Kuch, samajh mein nahi aaya Sharma Ji!

Sharma Ji - Intelligent Punches tum logon ke pare ki cheez hai....Lo, ab to deewar bhi aa gayi. Ab, Lab ki iss wall par tum logon ki tasveerin chada dun?

Sagoo ne apna munh, Sharma Ji ki taraf se ghumaya aur deewar ki taraf 180 Degree face karte huye, paani ki dhaar azad kar di.

Sharma Ji - Ae....Ye, kya kar rahe ho?

Sagoo - Suuuuu....Fuuuuuu!

Sharma Ji - Bally, usse rok. Mahangayi ke iss zamane mein iss rang ko kaise dho paayungi...Ahm!..paayunga.

Sharma Ji, roye - chillaye jaa rahe the. Par, Sagoo unki ek na sun raha tha.

Bally - Sab, aapki galati hai Sharma Ji! Aapne usse kaha tha ki wo Fuuuuu band kar de. To, usne kar di.

Sharma Ji - Lekin, patthe ne Su - Su kyun shuru kar di?

Bally - Ab, Sharma Ji usne aapki wall par kuch to Original likhna hi tha na. Aise, cut - paste kar ke thode wo 'Wah - Wahi!' lut sakta hai. Ye, hai uski originality ka namoona. Aur, iske liye, aapko bhonpu nahi khareedna padega. Har, subah aapko ye pakka rang iss duniya mein bhare Original aur Creative bandon ki yaad karwata rahega.

Sagoo - Play The Game!

Rates of Education

Aroras are a high society family living in the upper class neighborhood of Vasant Vihar located in Delhi. Mr. Lele Arora is an established film producer and owns a company which manufactures 'Aapke Dakar'(An antacid which relieves acidity). Enjoying life with his wife and their twin sons, Mr. Lele Arora is currently getting stressed with his life. The stress is giving him hair loss. The reason of the stress is one of the mischievous twin, Chandan. Now, Chandan and Vandan maybe twins but their philosophy on life is as contrary as their underwear brands. Vandan's daily basis includes studying at school and studying at home...Chandan on other hand enjoys pranking teachers/classmates at school and bugging Vandan at home. Hopefully, both of the 10 year old are in separate sections of Class 5th at their school.

Chandan is in Section A and views his class as a room of confinement. He views each of his teacher as a member of 'Al-Qaeda'! And the title of 'Osama Bin Laden' is held by his Maths Teacher, Mr. Sanki Chandra.

Mr. Chandra - Homework?

Chandan's fist' tightly clenched his pencil box, his legs froze, and his answer came in the form of a belch or in common words a burp.

Mr. Chandra - That was not your homework!

Chandan - That was a 'Dakar'....You can cure them by Antacid Fruit Salt made by my fathers company. Would you like to try our new flavor?

The whole class started to laugh and Chandan was marched to the Principal's Office. Things were starting to look a little bit dark for Section B which is Vandan's section.

Mrs. Pakhandi - Students! Today we are going to start Algebra.

Suddenly, a Peon from office came into the room.

Mrs. Pakhandi - It seems we have a special announcement from the Principal. Our, Section has been chosen for a research experiment. We are going to study, 'Graphing Logarithmic Functions' which apparently we study in Classes 11th and 12th....How exciting!

Vandan - YIPPY......!

'Sit down or I will stab you with my compass!'

After a week the Logs had seemed to cracked Vandan's mind, leading him to imagine that his sheets full of Logarithmic Graphs were talking to him.

Vandan - Logs, why are you so curved up?

Logs - It's the education system beta! Whenever a child fails or gets below average marks on his tests/exams I eat the child adding this curves on my straight and linear figure!

Vandan - Are you going to help me on the Board Test after Recess?

Logs - You have a 66.9% chance of passing the test compared to 35% population of India which is still illiterate. But, since just 7% of students graduate this lowers your percentage to the verge of becoming my dinner. My lines will reach out of the paper, then pull you in and after you are held together by my curves I will eat you!

Vandan's pants became wet.

Logs - Did you just Su - Su.....

Vandan - Sh! Quiet down. Let's make a deal. You help me on the test and I will draw a female stick figure for you.

Logs - My curves are getting a little bit edgy lately. It's a deal.

Mrs. Pakhandi's period started.

Mrs. Pakhandi - Vandan it's your turn to draw the graph on board. You may bring a piece of rough paper for calculations.

Vandan holding his Logs went in front of the board. He whispered quietly to Logs.

Vandan - KSSSHTT...Tell me the answer!

Vandan's eyes started to see Logs' lines forming words and his hands started to move at the speed of light which is c = 3.00 x 10^8 m/s.

The whole class started to laugh and when Mrs. Pakhandi looked at the board to read the joke her laughter got buried underneath her anger.

Mrs. Pakhandi - VANDAN ARORA...

Vandan - I knew what my surname was when I was in Nursery, Ma'am!

The laughter from class became heavier.

Mrs. Pakhandi - QUIET DOWN CLASS!  Explain to me the reason for such ill mannered behavior?

Vandan - It just says that, 'My communist nature forbids me from drawing any lines on the board!'

Logs - Hehe...Classic! 

Looks like Vandan's career is in jeopardy. Today the local Police were coming into every class and giving students some tips. Chandan's evil smile is enough to say that he is prepared.

Mr. Chandra - Ok, class these policemen are going to talk about the importance of our nation and what we can do to keep it safe.

Before the Policeman could speak, Chandan jumped on his bench and started screaming.

Chandan - He did it! Chandra did it...He is the head of multiple terrorist organizations. He is always teaching us Al - Geometria, Al - Alzebra...He is planning on selling each of us to different nations, after planning it with his Al - Rates of Studenta...Arrest him...Or, I will be getting eaten by a herd of bearded nudists tanning on Afghanistan rocks.

'Arrest Him, Harish!'

Mr. Chandra - You.....I will get you...You son of a....

Chandan - Son of Lele Arora!

The whole class was filled with joy and excitement. Back at Arora House, things were reversed now.

Lele Arora - Diya, Vandan is getting suspended for making fun of his teacher and Chandan is getting a medal next week for getting his terrorist teacher arrested....I think my hair are starting to grow back!

Morning Exercises

Doga - Haan toh jaisa ki hum sab jaante hain, Nagraj NWS mein bahut busy hai aur saath mein ek parallel series Nagayan bhi kar raha hai aur Dhruva toh pata hi nahi kahan chala gaya hai, isiliye maine aap sab heroes ko yahan bulaya hai tanki unka aane tak hum sab Dole-Shole bana lein aur aapni comicon ka satyanash kar dein. Toh chaliye shuru karte hain.


Bhokal - Kya TV par sundriyan dekhne ka time ho gaya?

Doga - Sabr karo mahabali, warna main tumhari biwion ko yeh bata dunga ki tum Pamela Anderson ke kitne bade Fan ho.

Kobi - Haan Mahajali moongfali, itna excited mat hoyo, tumhara dil hai ke samundar jab bhi koi kanya dekhi ussi ke picche pad jaate ho. Arey comic mein Censorship naam ki koi cheez hai ke nahi.

Doga - Haan toh paajiyon chalo shuru karein. Ok ab sab aapne-aapne haath bahar ko nikal lein, aur thoda sa ghutnon ko mod lein aur ab sab bolein AAH-OOH-AAH-OOH.....AAHHH-OOOHHH ke saath awaz mein zor le aayein. Yeh wali exercise subah Bathroom mein karne se Hip muscle relax hote hain.

Anthony - Par meri kabar mein toh Bathroom hi nahi hai.

Prince - Kanw-Kanw(Sharm karo Anthony. Aaj mujhe pata chala tumse woh sugandh kis cheez ki aati thi. Mera toh mann hi bhrasht kar diya. Main nahane ja raha hoon, agar peeche-peeche aaye toh tumhare peeche kauve chod dunga.)

Anthony - Arey Prince mujhe galat samajh rahe ho..arey suno toh sahi..Tumhare liye kaho toh Maxim magazine le aata hoon..Accha Crowboy chalegi kya..Ab mere liye Store se Playboy utha ker kaun laayega..Main bhi aa raha hoon Prince.

Doga - Haan toh unke jaane ke baad, baaki ke bache huye log yeh wali exercise karein. Subah 5 baje uth kar chatt par jaa ker Bhediyon ki tarah HU-HU-HU-HU karein. Aisa karne se "Main Bhi" jaisi ladkiyan pat jaati hain par thode se Consequences ho sakte hain isiliye aapne saath RC Forum member Ajay ki A.T.S.(Aatma Transport Sevice) Company ki Shield le jaayein.

Kobi - Kya, Main Bhi ki ladki pat jaayegi. Bhaad mein jaaye Jane, main toh chala. Main udi-udi jaawan, main "Main Bhi" phansawan...

Bhediya - Ruk ja dusht, aapni bhabhi par buri nazar se mat dekh.

Kobi - Abey jaa na Bhed ke bacche, tu toh sirf Hediya hai, B comic ke character, main A star hoon. Chal jo us tak pehle pahunch gaya ladki uski. Chalo bhaag.

Doga - Haan toh baaki ke log, Comic ki value badhane ke liye zor-zor se royein. Iss se Readers ke dil mein Emotions aa jaate hain, aur humara rona dekh kar aage se Comic-Ad dekh kar hi unka rona nikal jaayega. Yaad rakhiye sabhi ko Sensitivity pasand hai.

Bankeylal sabse zada ro raha hota hai.

Doga - Tum kyun itna zada ro rahe ho?

Bankeylal - Toh kya karoon, meri toh mat hi maari huyi hai, Comic ka rate 10 Rs aur badh gaya. Sabhi readers meri Comic ko laat maarne lage hain, aur jab maine Sanjay ji se darkhwast ki, ki meri Comics ko aur Humorous banayein toh unka kehna tha ki "Meri comics ke liye saare Jokes, The Great Indian Laughter Champions se utha ker laate hain aur un mein Navjot Singh Sidhu ka HEHEHE, daal dete hain, isiliye yeh dasha ho gayi hai". Buhuhuhu Hun sadda ki hou?

Doga - Yeh lo Puller machine, yeh button dabane se sab readers tumhari taraf khinch jaayenge. Ab jaao.

Bankeylal - Kutte, is mein battery toh daal dete.

Doga - Haan toh bhai, arey yeh kya keval Bhokal hi bacha hai. Gamraj, Steel aur Supi kahan hain aur Parmanu aur Fighter Toads ka kya hua?

Bhokal - Supi toh bahar Fighter Toads ke saath kanche khel raha hai, tanki uska Clone hone ka dukh thoda kam ho. Keh raha tha ki Fighter Toads bhi toh ek tarah se clone hi huye, isiliye Clone-Clone bhai-bhai. Aur Parmanu Jail jaane ke shock se paagal ho gaya hai aur kehta hai ki "Main Tiranga ka Side-character ban jaaunga, par Asbestos ki yeh costume nahi pehnunga, kyunki su-su karne mein problem aati hai isiliye meri Parmatma series ke liye mujhe bhi Nagraj jaisi Khaal laga do, chahe Yellow hi Spray paint kar dena." Aur Steel toh bahut bada ho gaya, kismat badal gayi uski. Kal hi China mein Photoshoot karke aaya hai, woh uski "Made in India" wali GF le kar gayi thi. Aur Gamraj toh wahan pada hua hai.

Doga - Gamraj, kya hua tum exercises mein participate nahi kar rahe?

Gamraj - Comic..low..Publicity..No dum..Energy nahi bachi...Chawanprash laa do..Comic nahi nikli.

Doga - Lagta hai tumhara Charas aur Afeem kha kar yeh haal ho gaya hai. Pehle hi kaha tha ki Drugs mat lo, par tum hoke poori shaunki character ho. Ab jaao, aapni agli Comic mein tumhe koi role de dunga.

Bhokal - Doga ab kya karein?

Doga - Theek hai bhai Exercises toh khatam ho gayin, ab chalate hain Beach par ghoomte hain. Suna hai wahan Visarpi roz aati hai. Aayo ab Adrak Chacha ki "Adrak and Bald Comic characters" meeting ka time ho gaya. Aur sunao tumhari agli series kab shuru ho rahi hai? Par mere paas Beach par ghumne se bhi badhiya idea hai, saath hi waale gym mein Monika Female characters ke saath exercise kar rahi hai. Chalo chal kar analysis karte hain.

Doga aur Bhokal chal kar Monika aur Female characters ki exercise dekhne lag jaate hain.

Monika - Ok girls, now put your hands up. Say with me One-Two, Trendy Baba we love you. Three-Four Ravi is such a bore...

Bhokal - Yeh Trendy Baba kaun hai?

Doga - Arey koi behroopiya aadmi hai, RC forum par Baba bana phirta hai. Wahan ke Members ki baatein Quote kar - kar ke khud ko Professional dikhata hai.

Bhokal - Chup kar nasamajh, Main Baba ka bahut bada fan hoon. Dusht, kambhakt main yahin dekhna chahta tha ki tera Baba ke baare mein kya reaction hoga. Bade muscle dikhata phirta hai na, kabhi Thigh muscle, kabhi Abs, kabhi Biceps..Chaddi phad dunga teri.

Doga - Dekh chaddi par buri nazar mat daal.

Bhokal - Ok man cut the tape, Author kaun hai iss story ka. Kambhakt, ke maare ko zameen par patka kar THS prop ke liye taiyar kar dunga. Chaddi kyun kheenchun main iski. Kaun likh raha hai yeh sab? Agli Comic mein tentua daba dunga Author ka jo mujhe iss waqt likh raha hai. Aur tum sab jo mujhe phad rahe ho, zada mat dekho warna geeli maar kar aankhein phod dunga tumhari...

Doga hakka - bakka wahin khada raha.

Dark Side

"Kanw-Kanw" (Utho Anthony, Subah ho gayi. Dekho mujhe dubara chillane par majboor mat karo, aajkal mere THS-CROWING classes chal rahe hain, jis mein hum sab kauvon ko Rahul ki photo dikha di jaati hai aur Himesh Reshammiya ka music sunaya jaata hai, tanki hum sab THS comics mein apni cameo appearance se apni saath wali Crow-Gals ko mate banne ke liye impress kar sakein.)


Anthony - Prince, main teri manhus aawaz sun kar toh raat ke 12 baje se jaag raha hoon, jab se tum Sophisticated Wishuman banne ke liye, mujhe NIKKATO HAIKU POETRY suna rahe ho. Pata nahi kahan se utha laaye, yeh Poetry-cum-One Liners.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Bakwas band karo aapni. Nikkato aaj kal hi bahut badi shaiyar bani hain, inko prize mein Trendy Baba Sign kiya hua "Kaccha Award" bhi mil chuka hai aur Maria toh Fan hi inki Poetry ki. Chalo ab jaldi se bahar nikal aayo.)

Anthony - Nikal toh aata, par koi meri kabar ke aage Ambuja Cement laga gaya hai.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw"(Toh Nagraj No.005 use karo.)

Anthony - Woh bhi use kar leta aur apni kabar ke picche waale backdoor se nikal aata par picche koi Visarpi ka poster laga gaya hai. Itna mazboot hai ki isse toh sirf Steroidoga kha kar hi toda ja sakta hai.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanwchika Waaun Waaun" (Mere khyaal se tumhari Dark Side khatam ho gayi hai, jinhe tum apni Powers kehte ho. Badi-badi deengein maarte the ne, ab bhugto.)

Anthony - Hey bhagwan, Dark Side kaise khatam ho gayi, kal hi toh "Black Computer" padh kar re-charge ki thi.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw (Woh Fighter Toads ki comic hai, isiliye choti hi Dark Side recharge huyi hogi.)

Anthony - Kuch jaldi kar Prince aur mujhe yahan se bahar nikal warna main ghut-ghut ke aapni jaan de dunga. Arey main toh bhool hi gaya tha ki main marr hi nahi sakta.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Zada cheko mat, aaj tak tumni jitni bhi Comics mein woh badi-badi fantasies dikhayi hain na ki agar tumhara haath cut gaya toh jisne kaata hai uska kaat diya, toh tumhara haath phir se re-grow ho jaayega, woh tum bhi bhali bhaanti jaante ho ki kisi jhooth se kum nahi hai. Aur tumhe "Jhoot Bole kauva kaate" waali kahavat ka bhi koi darr nahi, kyunki tumhare kehne par main sabhi kauvon ko shaant rakhta hoon. Aur ab un sab Villains ki payment bhi baaki hai jinko tumne Comic mein na jaaney kaise-kaise maara, arey maara kya woh toh humne un par beeth kar-karke Make-Up karwane ke liye raazi kar liya. Tumhare ghayal hone waale Make-Up ka kharcha alag. Mere toh sab baal jhad gaye hain issi Taanta Khaane mein. Kisi tarah apne Feather, Pari Rakshak Bhokal ko bech kar tumhare karze cuka raha hoon, usse aapni Beeth bhi deni padti hai tanki woh apne Par Safed spray kar sake. Us kambhakt Bhokal ko, Snow white, Cindrella, Pocahontas, Jasmine, ke Phone-Number chahiye woh alag. Besharm kal toh Tantar aur Talwar ke Dhani Bhokal ki Wife's ke Number maang raha tha.)

Anthony - Kya? Uski yeh himmat, Naya character kya ban gaya, ek-do comics kya chal padin, apni PRB series ko kya NWS samajh raha hai?

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Samajhta toh main nahi ki tum kya ho? Aaj tak toh mujhe yeh samajh nahi paaya ki tum yeh Pink and Black Costume paa kar ghumte ho ya phir Body ko Paint kiya hua hai. Aur Underwear bhi pehente ho ke nahi. Mera jeena haram kar rakha hai, kabhi Prince jaa ker dukaan se Playboy Magazine utha la, kabhi Rated-A for Anthony movies ka ticket laa de, kabhi mere ghar jaa ker Maria ki murabba banane mein help kar. Mujhe kya samajh rakha hai? Animal Rights naam ki koi cheez hai ke nahi.)

Anthony - Chalo mere pyaare Prince in sab baaton ko chodo aur mere liye Bankelal ki koi Comic laa do, jisse main apni Dark Side paa kar yeh kabar tod dun. Dekho jaldi karo, mujhe su-su aayi hai. Aur haan Comic CD format mein laa ker yeh kabar ki slaakh mein se khiska dena.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Main nahi laata, mujhe yaad hai pichli baar Dark Side ki Overdose ke baad tumne mujh par hi su-su kar diya tha, aur toh aur mere teen-patti khelte hue Friends ko khaa gaye the, yeh samajh kar ki tumhe Sanjay Ji Sadma-2 ya Dayan-2 mein role de denge, aur Aadil Ji tumhare liye "Main Bhi" bhi taiyar kar denge.)

Anthony - Main tujhe Nagayan Series mein Natasha ke kandhe par Cameo Appearance ke liye, Sanjay Ji se baat kar sakta hoon.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Nahi ji mujhe nahi chahiye Natasha, mujhe koi shauk nahi Nagayan mein ek aur Kid join karwane ki.)

Anthony - Please Prince, accha Crow ban kar Dark Side laa de, dekh mere peeth ki haddi tut rahi hai.

Prince - "Kanw-Kanw" (Koi zarurat nahi Raj Comics Forum member Karan ki Repeated Comedy karne ki. Laa deta hoon tumhare liye Dark Side. Intezar karna Dark Side se bharpoor Bankeylal Comic laane ke liye Pirated Comic Smuggler ke paas jaa raha hoon.)

Moh.D

"Mere bhai ki shaadi hai. Meri kab hogi?"


Trendy Baba, apni subah ki, 'Morning Exercises', Bathroom se kar ke laute hi the, ki unhe Rahul apni taraf daudta dikhayi diya.

Rahul - Baba gazab ho gaya. Forum par kuch behroopiye poster aa gaye hain aur ashleel harkatein kar rahe hain. Ek banda koi, 'amitabhkar_stit' ne toh khud ko, 'Forum ka Acharaya' kehna bhi shuru kar diya. Apki nakal kar raha hai, Hindi mein type kar!

Baba ki Gas abhi poori nikalti, usse pehle hi Bunty98 unki taraf dauda aaya.

Bunty98 - Baba, every underwear has a, 'Peela' stain on them. Guess what, as I was surfing the Forum, I saw a big group of, 'Poly Cadets', joining together to form a big topic of, 'Private Conversation', where they can do, 'Gaali-Galachods' on the Moderators and say, 'Maaa..Dhuri Dixit' to any Topic they want.

Rahul - Baba, subah hi, Marijuana ke patton ka paan bana kar khaa raha tha. Side effect hai!

Bunty98 - Haan, Baba, Randhawa ne ek naya Harsh likh diya hai. Aur iss baar sab log uski Genuine tareef kar rahe hain. Arun Ji ne toh usse, 'Mohit Jr.' tak ka naam de diya hai.


"Arun (Renowned Moderator of Raj Comics Forum) wrote:


Mohit Jr, tum gr8 ho."


Trendy Baba chup rahe. Par ab lagta tha unhe apni chupi todne ka Time aa gaya tha.

Trendy Baba - WHAT THE FREAK? What the hell is wrong with this Forum man? I mean, I already have trouble with that, Karu...Ahem, Ahem. Yeh, Amitabh bhai ko kitni baar samjhaya hai, ki jab bhi main kuch likhun aake bas itna likh jaayein, 'Very good Mohit, keep it up'. Main toh bas ek Jamadar hun joh apne, 'Log-In' se le kar, 'Log-Out' tak har Topic mein jaa kar apni Non-sencial posts karta rehta hun. Kisi ko shak naa ho, isiliye, bade-bade words bhi use karta hun. In short, Meri baji huyi hai..Band.

Rahul - Ek, baar jaa ke, Baba ki stories dekh aa. Cancer se teri aankhein thodi jalne lagengin.

Rahul ke kahe inn lafzon ne Baba ka pehle se hi, 'Materialised' Dil aur jhakjhor diya.

Trendy Baba - Bas, ab aur nahi main chod raha hun yeh ashram. Aur chod raha hun yeh, 'Baba' waali Factory. Utar dunga yeh choga.

Bunty98 - Nahi, Nahi, Andar jaa ker utariye. Yahan mat change kijiye.

Trendy Baba, apni Wig utar kar, apni mala utar kar, apni, 'I Heart Wishu' wala sticker utar, waapis Mohit ban gaye, aur nikal pade apni Journey ko, apne hi Forum se dutkare, hull-hullaye.

Mohit - Mujhe, 'Atta' chahiye. Do boriyan.

Rahul - yeh lijiye. Par aap, jaa kahan rahe hain?

Mohit, apni Trendsterpane se bahar nikalne ke liye, Music Studio pahunch gaye. Tabhi bhi, usse beech-beech mein yaad aate rehte woh pal.



"haryana (A Renowned Artist on Raj Comics Forum) wrote:


Sagar hi best hai."


Thode, Acche pal.


"amitabhkar_nit (Renowned Analyst of Raj Comics Forum) wrote:


Mohit, jeete raho. Bada, Innovative sochte ho."


Jazzy P - Welcome, hega jee. Myself, Jazzy Singh Pirate. Assi sab kuch chak layi da. Malyalam, Kannada, Telugu, Tamil, ethon tak ki jehde, 'Bhikari', Sidewalk teh baithe gaa reh hunde ne, assi taan unhan nu vi nahi bakshade. Jee, saddi Range kaafi wide hai. Huni, assi naven gaane upar kaam kar rahe hain. Huni tuhanu sunnane haan. Oye, Jassi chak de...

"Battiyan bujhai rakhdi, veh main...Yo, man pump it up. Let's show these Uncles. Main behni haan tootiyan sadakan teh, mainu siga tera intezar. Par, NGO vaalyean ne karti dher. NGO, layi taan hun main, Oye hun main khaa jaani hai macchar samajh ke Seb eh..."

Jazzy P - Oh ji, enhu assi Remix bana ke, Vadhiya Slums de vich bhejange. Uh ki hai naa, Slums de vich eh gaane kaafi Hit ho jaande ne. Teh tussi kaun?

Mohit - Sir, main Mohit hun. Aur mujhe, Show off karne ka bada shaunk hai.

Jazzy P - Ajo ji, pher taan andar langh ayo. Ik din bahut vade, B Grade Actor banoge lagda. Chalo, ji aah lo Mike, teh CHAK DOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Abhi, Recording shuru bhi nahi huyi thi ki tabhi awaz aayi, 'SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS'.

Jazzy P - Oye, Jassi tu pher oh Sites teh chala gaya.

Jassi - Nahi, Sir, Site band ho chuki hai. Oye dekho, Sir aah ki kar reha.

Mohit, Mike ko munh mein daale khada tha.

Jazzy P - Phitte munh, aah ki karta oye?

Mohit - Jee, Main ek bahut bada, 'Review-Eater' hun, par pichle kuch dinon se Forum par mere upar Ban lag chuka hai. Ab toh kuch bhi khaa leta hun.

Jazzy P - Chal nikal jaa ethon bahar. Dubara shakal dikhayi teh, Lips nu vada kar deyange, 'Angelina Jolie' de wangu.

Mohit, phir se dutkara huya aage badh chala. Ghoomte-ghoomte, aisi jagah pahunch gaya, jiska naam agar 6 baar lo toh Brain Failure ho sakta hai. Fame waale, Flashback abhi bhi zaari the.


"haryana wrote:


Sagar hi best hai. Vote for Sagar."


Ah, just Read On.

Toote-Foote Furniture se bana huya, Banner laga tha, jis par likha tha, "Savere Commandwa Dhrabdi Clubva, Pankhe ke Saath".

Mohit - God, I hate myself.

Andar, Important lagne waali, actual mein kuch na hone waali meeting chal rahi thi. What do these meetings mean anyway?

Kbuster - Haan toh Cadets boliye, 'I Am Somebody'. Isse bolte rahiye, aur aaj se yahin apni Posts mein likhte rahiye, phir dekhiye Instant Success for our Captain Dhruva.

Mohit - You have got to be kidding me.

Kingsatyan - Cadets, look, lagta hai Trend bhai bhi hume join karne aaye hain. Cadet Nogdev, please unhe greet karo.

Nogdev - Sir, dukaan band ho chuki hai...Mera matlab iss taraf aayie, Sir, main apke liye Gift le kar aata hun.

Mohit, akele mein baitha, apne saath laayi huyi, 'Atte' waali boriyan khaa raha tha, ki tab tak Nogdev waapis aaya.

Nogdev - Yeh lijiye, apki Cheerleading waali Dress, aur ek Pamphlet jo explain karta hai, ki Cadets ki tarah kaise Post kara jaaye.

Mohit - UWAIK.

Un, hun, Ulti kar di, woh bhi CAPS mein.

Mohit wahan se nikal bhaga. Pata nahi, bhaag kyun raha hai. Arey dekho, dekho, piche se Car aa rahi hai. Aur yeh huyi TAKKAR. Kuch bolna chahenge?

Mohit - Peeth ki haddi tut gayi.


"amitabhkar_nit (A Renowned Analyst On Raj Comics Forum) wrote:


Shabash Mohit, well done."


Mohit ki aankhein, Hospital mein khulin.

Rahul - Ab, kaise ho Baba? Ghabriye mat humne apka Blood Transfusion kara diya hai. Kuch chahiye?

Mohit - Kattu.

Rahul, bahar gaya.

Rahul - Chal, aa bhai Kattu, tujhe bula rahe hain.

Kattu andar aaya.

Mohit - Kaisa hai?

Karan - Jee, ab kya bataun, jab kuch likhta hun Forum pe, Arun Ji se yahin reply milta hai, 'Bahut accha khoon karte ho Karan'. Pehle toh, Coincidence laga, par ab toh meri, Photo dekh kar bhi yahin kehte rehte hain.

Mohit - Koi, Karan ke liye Cocaine le ke aayo. Charas, Ganza, kuch chahiye toh bolo?

Karan - Bas, woh aapse woh Hindi waala Text chahiye, jis se Harsh likh dete ho. Kuch naya toh milta hai nahi, bas har baar woh, 'N.G.O.' hi likhte rehte ho. Aur koi kaam nahi hai kya? Amitabh bhaiya ko kitni ghus de rakhi hai? Hain! Ab toh meri Copy bhi kar li meri. Apni posts mein coma laga ke, space daba ke, capital letters daal ke. Kuch, Quality hai ke nahi?

Mohit - How, old are you?

Karan - Old, enough to destroy you darling!

Mohit, bhai ki aankhein khul gayin. Unhe aakhirkaar sab samajh aa gaya. Samjha toh hum pehle hi dete, par kuch space bhi toh bharni padti hai na.

Mohit - Chalo, Asharam ki aur, waapis.

Mohit, bhai chal pade waapis, 'Trendy Baba' banne. Unki, absence ko cover karne ke liye, 'Orkut' par ek message ubhar aaya.

"Typhoid got Mohit...void" (Blogger Shree Mohit Sharma)!

टूपी - टूपी, टप - टप!

नील शर्मा के एडिटर दोस्त आये,

'नमस्ते!' बोलते ही ठंडा - गरम खाने को जीभ लप लप हुए जाए.

अब पूछेंगे सब का बायोडाटा,

अरे, कोई समझायो इन्हें, खुद का लड़का पांचवीं फेल फिर भी दूसरों का ही छापना होता है परचा.



फटाक से बोल पड़े, 'कहाँ है आपका छोटा बेटा?'

'जी, वो कविता लिख रहा है', आया जवाब,

'उसकी उम्र क्या है?'

'अभी ६ के हुए हैं छोटे नवाब!'

'क्लास में भी आता है फर्स्ट या कविता लिखना ही है उसका इंटरेस्ट?'

'जी, उसे तो ना द्राविड या दादा बनने की है चिंता...

लोलीपोप मुंह में दबाये लिखता रहता है कविता!'

'यह तो हो गया ज़ाकिर हुसैन वाला 'वाह',

'जी, काहे का वाह, कविता लिख - लिख १० - १५ कापियां हैं भर डाली..

और, प्रेशर के टाइम में भी कॉपी उठा कर चला जाता है शुरू करने पानी का प्रवाह...

अब, नितिन को कौन समझाए...

गिल्ली - डंडे से किसी की आँख न फोड़े, ना पतंग के पेचे लड़ाए!'

'शर्मा इतना भी मत बनो शय - शय,

तेरे घर फरहान अख्तर है बैठा,

फिर भी तुझ जैसा जावेद युस ना करे दये,

अब, तू मस्त होकर पि बौर्न - विटा,

कल, तेरी तन और मन की शक्ति बढ़ाएगा वाई - फाई.'



रविवार के दिन ६ बजे ही नील शर्मा के घर इक्कठा हो गया मीडिया,

शर्मा जी, ने दरवाज़ा खोला और मीडिया को भागने का ढूंढने लगे आईडिया.

'यहाँ, लंगर होने वाला है या है यह भक्तों की टोली,

थोड़े कूल - कूल होकर आयो, बाथरूम जाने की मेरी अब आई है बारी!'

मीडिया वालों ने खुला दरवाज़ा देख कर अन्दर धावा बोला,

बम - बम बोलते उनके पीछे जा रहे शर्मा जी का दिल रिंगा - रिंगा डोला.



लो, जिस महान पोएट को ना जागने के लिए शर्मा साहब सबको इशारा कर रहे थे की बोलो आहिस्ता....

वो, नितिन शर्मा ने तो शुरू कर दी थी अपनी कविता.



अब, शुरू होंगे मीडिया के सवाल,

नील शर्मा जी के लाल - लाल हुए जाएँ गाल.

इससे, पहले पूछा जाता कोई सवाल..

नितिन ने मुंह में डाल लिया लोलीपोप, और बोला.

'ओ अंकलों मुझे किड्नाप करने आये हो?...जल्दी, करो पर पहले मेरा स्कूल बैग उठा लो!'

'बेटा, इमरान का करियर लुटने के बाद, आमिर ने हम से रनबीर की किड्नापिंग की शपथ है खिलवायी....

तुम्हे कविता लिखनी कबसे आई?'

'ऐसे, बेतुके शब्दों को फिर से जोड़ कर अगर बनाया तुम अंकलों ने सेंटेंस...

निरूपा रॉय की कसम, तोड़ दूंगा तुम्हारे तेलेविसीन सेट कूद के तुम्हारी फेन्स!'

'मगर.....'

'कविता के बारे में जानना ही है तो लोलीपोप का लायो डब्बा..

साइड, हटो मुझे जाने दो बाथरूम विद माय डब्बा!'



नितिन की लोलिपोपों की लोटरी लग गयी,

और फिर नितिन बोल ही उठा...

'अरे, अंकल्स कविता मेरी कविता का नहीं मेरी गर्लफ्रेंड का नाम है...

ये, आदात मुझे मुकेश भैया ने है डाली,

क्यूँ की उनकी गर्लफ्रेंड का नाम है दीपाली.

पर, आप लोगों ने मेरी लोलीपोप की लोटरी लगा दी,

लो, एक कॉपी ले जायो,

इस में मैंने कविता है भरी हुयी,

अगली, बार आयोगे तो ले के आने तंदूरी नान के साथ चिकेन बिरयानी!'

Sharma Ji Ka Badla

Aaj, Municiplaity Nigam, ka naya-naya uadghatan tha. Sab, Newly Appointed Untrained Workers, ko muft mein, kulche chole khaane ko mile...Isiliye, Municipality Office ke bahar waale, 'Solo' Bathroom mein kaafi lambi line lagi thi..


"Hatiye - Hatiye...Raasta dijiye...V.I.P. bande, ko Municipality ka Bathroom todne ki choot, Juniors se pehle milti hai...Gadhe, hatne ko keh raha hun..Aur tu yahin, Phatna chahta hai...Aayie, Sharma Ji.."


Haal, hi mein bharti huye, Juniors ke beech kaafi khusar-pusar chal rahi thi.


"Bawa, yeh Sharma Ji kaun hain?"


"Beta, yeh Ghus lene waale, Municipality Karamchariyon ke liye ek, 'Legend' hain...Jab, yeh Municipality mein lage the..Tab ek, Kulche Waale ne, inhe, Jamalghote wala Kulcha khila diya tha...Ab, Sharma Ji ka Pressure ban gaya...Unhone aaw dekha na taav, jhatt se, Municipality ke Kude waale Dibbe, mein apna kriya karam kar diya...Phir, Sharma Ji ne pran liya ki, apni Fame waapis le kar hi chodenge..Sab se, pehle unhone ussi Kulche Waale ki Bathroom ki, Pipe tod di..Jab uske, Bathroom mein kaafi zada, Gand jama ho gaya toh, Double Paise le kar theek ki...Uske baad, Sharma Ji ki, Reign of Shame shuru huyi..Pehle, Sharma Ji, Priavate Clincon ke bahar ghumte rehte, Aur jab koi Beemar Mareej, Ulti kar deta..Toh ussi, Ulti ko Gift Wrap karate aur subah ko apne Doggy ke saath Morning Walk par aaye Vyakti ko thama deta..Ulti dekh kar, us bande ko bhi Ulti aa jaata..Itne hi, Time mein Sharma ji us ka Kutta utha le jaate, aur moti rakam enthte..Phir, kabhi sadak par, subah ke 3 baje hi, Naale waala Paani chidak dete, aur jab log aa kar complaint karte..Toh, Sharma Ji poora, Jackpot jeet jaate....."


Sharma Ji, ne Bathroom ka darwaza khola..Aur andar dekh kar behosh hote - hote bache.


Sharma Ji - Lagta hai yeh, Municipality waale, poora ka poora, Dinner yahin aa kar karte hain.


Sharma Ji, abhi apni Dincharya poori kar hi rahe the ki, Bazar mein ho - halla mach gaya.


"Bhaago! Maine galti se, Saand ko Kurkure khila diye hain.."


Log, aksar Cows ko, Grass khilate hain..Aur, yeh mahanubhav, ek Step aage jaana chah reh hain..Arey, Sharma ji zara darwaza kholiye..Nahi, Khol Sakte toh suniye..Saand apke, Bathroom ki aur hi aa raha hain..Aur, yeh huyi Takkar..


Sharma Ji - Bachao! Toilet mein, Bhukamp aa gaya hai.


Sab, Municipality Officers ne aa kar, Toilet ka darwaza khola.


"Yeh toh, Slumdog waala scene ho gaya."


Municipality Officers ki meeting bulayi gayi.


"Sharma Ji, Coma mein chale gaye hain..Hume, unka badla lena hi hoga..Yahan jo bhi, Untrained Juniors hain unko, Order milta hai ki woh, jald se jald, shehar ke sabhi, Bhainson ko Behosh kar yahan le aayein..Iss tarah se, Trainees ka, Test bhi ho jaayega aur..Hogi, Bhainson ki Neelami."


Untrained Juniors, Kurla ki Basti mein pahunche..jahan Yamunda, paas hi ke Park mein ghaas kha raha tha.


Yamunda - Tatti - Tatti, Ghaa teh, Thanda - Thanda Paani..Khaana - Peena, Khaa ke mainu yaad aa gayi meri nani.

"Pappe, Thok De Killa."

Pappe, ne Tranquilizer Gun, se Fire kiya..Par, kuch der baad bechara thak gaya.


Pappe - Yaar, Kambhakt par 10 darts fire karta hoon..Par uski, Poon hi nahi bolti.


Yamunda, ki Poon bol chukti thi..Aur, iska pata uske piche se aayi Gas se lag gaya tha. Untrained Juniors, se Yamunda ki, Methane Gas aur sunghi nahi gayi..Aur, Face Mask naa laane ke kaaran sab nikal gaye.....Idhar, Yamunda madmast huya apni nazarein, Basanti par tika chuka tha.


Yamunda - Basanti, main aa raha hun.


"Yamunda, Paagal Ho Gaya Hai Kya?"


Shankalu - Gadhe, mujhe chaat kar..tune mera dhram bhrasht kar diya..Aur toh, Aur meri Laal Chaddi bhi phatwa di..Guru, Bahar Niklo..Nahi, toh main basti waalon ko bata dunga ki tum saara time andar kya karte ho!


Gamraj - Oye, Kudiyan Nu Appan Chuck Deyange! Kya baat hai, Nangalu? Itna shor kyun macha rahe ho.


Shankalu - Apne, Suputar ko dekho..Apne, Daddy ke saamne khade hote huye bhi kya, Garden seench raha hai!


Yamunda, ka nishana iss baar theek laga tha, aur woh Basanti ko dekh, apni Poonch maar raha tha.


Yamunda - I Love You..Ruko, Abhi apne Father-In-Law se, tumhara Khur maangta hun..Hick...


Shankalu - Kutte, meri Basanti se door reh!


Gamraj - Shankalu yeh, Kutta nahi, Bhainsa hai..Lagta hai, Dildeep Singh ki Doga waali Art ka tumhe gehra sadma laga hai.


Yamunda - Gamraj Papa Ji, Main Basanti leni a..Hick..


Gamraj - Control your Feelings, Young Man......


Gamraj, apni baat poori bhi nahi kar paaya tha ki, Yamunda doosre Tabelon ki taraf chal pada.


"Eh, Nalaik, Eh Crack hai..Ehda, Nagraj Waala Thoda jeha Track hai..OOOOO...Balle - Balle. Shava..Balle - Balle, Shava..Eh Taan, Marjaana...Check This Out, YO...Saada Hai Nayenna...Nit Navin Bhains Fasaunda Hai...Balle - Balle, Shava."


"Gamraj, apne Bhainse ko sambhalo..Isne meri 12 Bhainson ko apni peeth par laad liya hai."


Lagta hai, Pattha Maal Iktha Kar Raha Hai!

Sukda Abs

Gamraj - Kitna, neeche gaya?


Shankalu - Guru....10kg aur ghat gaya!

Gamraj - Meri, Share Market ki body ka aaj tak profit toh huya nahi..Comics ke abhav mein wajan 20kg hi reh gaya hai...Papa Jee, isse accha mujhe 'Lijjat Papad' hi bana dijiye..Khud ko khaa toh sakunga!

Shankalu - Guru, mujhe ab pata chala Yamunda tumhari taraf itna ghurta kyun hai..Isse accha toh tum apne liye ek, Striped Kaccha maang lo. Socho, Basti mein kabhi kisi ne do Kacchadhari Character nahi dekhe honge. Hum...Kacchadhari Brothers ki dhaak jam jaayegi...Phir, kuch samay ke baad hum Yamunda ko bhi Tambu se ek Kaccha sil denge. Basti, mein 'Kaale Kacchadhari Trio' ki dahshat phail jaayegi...Zara, socho Guru.

Gamraj - Nangalu....Ahm! Shankalu yeh sab tab theek tha jub humare General Issues nikalte the. Mujhe, phir se waapis aane ke liye kuch chahiye...Jaise, Doga Artwork mein dabe hokar bhi ab tak ventilator se chal raha hai.

Shankalu - Guru, main potty kar ke aaya. Zara, rukna!

Shankalu, 1 ghante baad aaya.

Shankalu - Guru, maine Bathroom mein jaa kar yeh research kar li hai ki tum mein woh kya nahi hai jo, Dropped Heroes tak mein hai...Yahan, tak ki Shakti mein bhi hai!

Gamraj - Copied Character hona?

Shankalu - Nahi, Guru...Abs..Ab, dekho jab Tiranga apni Comic ke Climax mein Jabkatre ya Chenchor bane Bhikhari ki chehre se mask utarta hai toh woh log uski Abs, dekh kar hi apni payment latka dete hain...Gurur, isiliye toh Tiranga ab tak chalta raha..Guru, main to kehta hun iss baar Lion Gym se accha tum yahin mere, 'Tuhada Surkhi Laal Kaccha Gym' mein training shuru kar do..Lo, Guru main Doga ki purani Comics ka Narration bhi shuru kar deta hun.

Aur, Narration shuru huya.

Shankalu - Apni, dincharya permanent rakhne ke liye Doga ne pehli Push-Up maarna shuru kiya.

Gamraj, Push-Up position mein aa gaya.

Shankalu - Doga, aadhe distance mein hi pahuncha tha ki uske munh se bhayankar awaz nikli, 'HUMF'.

Gamraj - HUMRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA............

Shankalu - Arey, nahi Guru tum toh Antakshari khelne lagey.

Gamraj - Bade Vaaman, tu meri peeth par chal raha hai.

Shankalu - Sorry, Guru woh Doga ki comic padh kar mere andar ka He-Man jaag jaata hai...Tum, Continue karo...HUMF ko dobara dohrayo.

Gamraj - HUMKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA............Yamunda, ne kaat liya!

Shankalu - Guru, ghabrayo mat Rabies ke injection nahi lagwane padenge...Woh, kutte jaise Doga ke paas aate hain...Toh, effect dene ke liye Yamunda ko maine hi bola tha..Aahista kaatna tha, Saand!

Gamraj - Chele, tu toh mera Raag Peeda - Padi baja raha hai. Yeh, sab mujh se nahi hoga...Aur, dekho mujhe toh paseena bhi aa gaya..Mere, andar ek ajab sa kampan ho raha hai.

Shankalu - Guru, woh toh jo tum apni Comic band hone ke baad afeem leni shuru kar di thi. Woh, kampan ussi ke khatam hone ka nateeja hai. Guru, aisa karo phir se apne kapdon mein rui bhar lo.

Gamraj - Aur, Abs?

Shankalu - Guru, itney kum samay mein Abs toh Spray - Paint kar ke hi mil sakte hain..Picchle hi hafte, Basanti ne taaza - taaza gobar diya tha..Maine, ussi se Spray - Paint bana liya tha. Aur, kaamchuran, kajal, hair blackner jaise aur product bhi. Socha, tha Super Heroes ko bech kar unki Comics ka satyanash karunga. Par, jo Artwork kar raha hai, uske liye hum apna Fresh Gobar kyun barbad karein. Global Warming ko kum karne ke liye, Kurla Basti hi toh sab kuch kar rahi hai.

Shankalu ki ghanton ki ba mashakkat ke baad, spray - paint dwara Abs bana diye gaye. Aur, Gamraj ne apne shirt aur pant mein rui bhar kar taiyari kar li.

Shankalu - Bhainson aur Purple prajati ke Bhainson...pesh hai..Weighing ina 20.5 Kg..One - Half of The Kacchadhari Brothers Duo...Kurla ke Tabelon ka Rambo..Balra...Gamraj..Please Khur maarein!

Tabhi, Yamunda ne Slumdog waala scene kar diya.

Shankalu - Lo, Guru tumhari Abs ka Yamunda ne udghatan kar diya.

Gamraj - Shankalu, hume meri return ko aur meri Abs development ko highlight karne ke liye ek function rakhna chahiye.

Shankalu - Sahi, baat hai Guru!...Main abhi WTS fame Lalit Jee se tumhare Promotional Artwork ki baat karta hun.

Gamraj - Yaar, main toh pehle hi single pasli hun...Lalit Jee ne draw kar diya toh mere toh baal bhi nahi bachenge!

Shankalu - Toh, Guru Dhruva ki Comics waale Artist kaise rahenge?

Gamraj - Hahahahahahahahaha................Shankalu, tune toh meri Spray - Painted Abs ke bhi ansu nikaal diye.

Shankalu - Chalo, Guru Artwork chodo. Hum, event organise karte hain...Par, Doga ko mat bulana Guru, kahin pichli baar ki tarah tumhari rui na nikaal de.

Event Organise ho gaya aur sab Super Heroes aane lage. Gamraj aur Shankalu sabhi Heroes ko receive karne khade ho gaye.

Shankalu - Guru, Fighter Toads aa gaye!

Gamraj - Dafa, ho jaayo yahan se..Kahin, mere Yamraj Papa ko hi apna naya Toad Dev na bana lo...Yahan, par koi bhola - bhola nahi hai..Par, agar na nikle toh meri gazab ki Abs tumhe laat maar kar nikalengi.

Fighter Toads - Jaate hain...Hum toh tumhe tumhari Comics ke girte prabhav ke kaaran Adopt karne aaye the...Par, yeh jo 6 naye type ke macchar apni chaati par laga kar ghum rahe ho..Usse zada badhiya macchar, Nagraj ke paas hain. Hunh!

Shankalu - Guru, tumhari Abs ko macchar bol gaye...Khush, ho jaayo Guru main toh ek hi jhatke mein sabse badhiya Absartist ban gaya....Chalo, Next!

Parirakshak Bhokal - Aa Gu N Gu Bulap Ab Gat Ak Bha..........

Gamraj - Lagta hai, apne lagataar failures' se tumhe shock lag gaya hai. Jaayo, andar langar khaa lena.

Shankalu - Guru, aise toh poori raat guzar jaayegi..Phir, Abs kisse dikhaoge..Tum, Punjabi gaana lagwa do...Aane waale Heroes aate rahenge..Hum, apna event shuru kartey hain...Aur, Harpal tu shuru hoja.

'Daaru pini...Murge khaane...Shaunk Awale Ne...Jaatan De Putt Abs ugana...Chahunde kalle ne....Haye...Abs, ugande kallam - kalle ne...Evein kisi di majal joh enhan vall nazar laga je kalle hoye.....Assi, taan Abs de upar bitha ke macchar challe ne...Haye...Oye, sun Doge Oye.....'

Shankalu - Present Heroes aur Dropped Heroes, pesh hain mere Guru, Gamraj..Taadiyan.

Gamraj ne aa kar apni muscles aur abs ki pardarshani shuru kar di..Gamraj, Flex karta gaya aur Super Heroes Bowled hote gaye. Pandrah minute baad Gamraj ne break li.

Shankalu - Toh, kya khyaal hai aap logon ka.

Koi, kuch nahi bola! Tiranga sabsey pehle utha aur stage ke upar aa kar Gamraj ke pair chu liye.

Tiranga - Bolo, Pappe Gamraj Di.........

Heroes - Abs!

Tiranga - Aur, zor se!

Heroes - Tune, bulaya Abs vaaleya...Main taan Nagraj da sapp gale ch paaleya....Hai, kaun hai Abs da Artist Laaleya....Assi, taan Dhruva da Filter tere charanan ch paa leya...Saanu, tu Abs da daan de Jhuley Vaaleya.....Assi, Doga Da Aritst change karwa leya...Hoye.

Shankalu - Aur, zor se...Sab log chadawa bhi daalte jaayo...Yahan, Basanti ke saamne chadawa daal do...Tumhe, manchahi Abs prapat hongi!

Tiranga - Pappe Gamraj, main sabhi Dropped Heroes ki taraf se request karta hun ki hume apna Side - Character bana lein!

Nagraj - Haan, main bhi Side - Character banunga.

Dhruva - Main bhi...Par, ek baar phir se apne Abs Flex kar dijiye. Main, Parmanu ko apney liye notes likhwana bhul gaya tha.

Gamraj, ne Abs ki Flex shuru ki. Stage, ke peeche Yamunda ne apni Comics band hone ke baad joh apna System rok kar rakha tha , woh usse Clear karne mein lag gaya. Paanch minute mein hi Yamunda ki Gobar ki sughandh har jagah phail gayi.

Nagraj - Arey, Gamraj ke Abs ke paseene ki smell se Dhruva behosh ho gaya.

Shankalu - Guru, ruk jaayo! Controversy shuru hone waali hai.

Parmanu - Meri, toh naak mein Filter bhi nahi hai.

Shakti - Nirbhay ho jaayo! Main apni ushma se........Haing........Mujhe, koi zaroori kaam yaad aa gaya.

Nagraj - Sheetnagkumar, Saudangi, Nagu! Bahar aayo.

Sheetnagkumar - Sorry, Nagraj! Main, Constipation waale environment mein bahar nahi aata.

Nagu - Mujhe, kyun bula raha hai...Apney, Dangi aur 'Kumar Gaurav' ko hi bula! Waise, bhi tumhe toh Nagfani Sarp samay - samay par shaktiyaan dete rehte hain...Ab, unhi se maangiyo!

Parmanu - Anthony, tumhi kuch karo...Iss, Abs ke paseene ki smell se garmi badh rahi hai!

Anthony - Thehro! Main apni Thandi Aag se Gamraj ki Abs theek karta hun.

Anthony, ne apni zulfon ko hata kar ek bada hi sateek waar kiya.

Shankalu - Guru, utho tumhari Abs waala Spray - Paint toh utar gaya!

Tiranga - Hain! Lagta hai Pappe Gamraj ki Abs ko Peeliya ho gaya hai...Suna hai, yeh chune se phailta hai...Sab, apni Abs bachao...Agar, yeh kisi ki Abs ko lag gaya toh sab Comics mein zadatar time bathroom mein hi bitate nazar aayoge.

Anthony - Chal, aa Prince! Humari kabr mein toh Bathroom bhi nahi hai...Hum, apni Abs, bachayein!

Nagraj - Isiliye, Gamraj apni Abs chupane ke liye peeli shirt pehenta hai...Bhaago, sab!

5 minute mein poora function khaali ho gaya.

Shankalu - Guru utho! Ab, Abs toh nahi ban paaye...Abhi, bhi Kacchadhari Brothers waal idea hai.

Gamraj ka munh band ho gaya.

Doga ki Shaadi ka Card! :)

Ye hai Doga ki Shaai ka Card (2007).